What does it say about me that I don't try to hide the smell of alcohol on my breath from my husband but the scent of sesame seeds instead? I'm certain it's not healthy to be filled with glee when Sweety gets in the shower because that is my cue to scamper into the kitchen and eat cheese dipped in sesame seeds as long as the shower is running.
I tell you all a couple of posts down that I've lost a little weight and then spend the next few days eating anything that isn't nailed down. I'm my own worst enemy. At least it's not heroin. Right? But if it was heroin, at least I'd be skinny. But my skin would probably look like shit and my teeth would be falling out.
I'm just killing some time tonight. For some reason, I'm not really sleepy. My laptop is acting like an ass so I've abandoned it for the desktop that's hidden in the back of the house. Something is weird with it though and when I go to any blogs, the font is tiny and I can't read them. Phooey. I'll just blather here instead of nosing around blogland.
Sweety is in bed. He's getting up at 1:30 a.m. to go watch concrete be poured. The place that he works for is building a new warehouse/office space and he's been the pushing person behind it and wants to see the cement go down. They start pouring at 2 a.m. I'm happy for him. I know this building is something that he's been dying to see done and it's been about 4 years or so in the making. When it's finished, he will have to go half as far to work. We will be able to have all of our teeth plated in gold with the money that'll be saved in gas. Or not.
Last Sunday was our 7th anniversary. I can't believe that I've been in this hellhole (Florida) for 7 years already. I have served exactly half of my sentence because in 7 more years, LittleBrother(11) will be 18 and we can move out of this hot-no season having-palm trees abound-place. I will see snow again from my bedroom window before I die! And autumn leaves!
To celebrate, we went out to eat and to the sex toy shop and bought some interesting things. Do you know what is more dangerous than me being three sheets to the wind with a small riding crop in my hand? Nothing. Ahem.
I mentioned to Sweety that I still liked him a whole bunch after 7 years. He thinks we're still together because we haven't suffered any sort of bad thing or major hardship together yet. I say, why do you have to have a bad thing? Maybe we'll get really lucky and miss any major shitstorms. As long as he keeps his weenie in his pants when I'm not around - I don't see why we won't make it another 7.
The bitches are freshly bathed because we're going to my sister's tomorrow. Think I'm going to bed in LB's room and taking Tiny Dog with me.
For the love of all that is good and holy. Can't these kids LB shut up for TWO consecutive minutes? The whining! Sweet, tiny, hasn't let out a colicky cry yet, baby Jesus! The whining! What have I done to deserve this? I feed you little dirt urchins. I took you to the movies. (Hancock rocked, by the way.) All I want is a tiny bit of PEACE and QUIET! Are your damn 3 inch voices broken? Pick, pick, pick, pick. I swear, if I hear LittleBrother(11) whine one. more. time....I do not know what I will do. I was thisclose to going into their room while ago and just yelling at them that I was fixing to lose my shit if they didn't knock it off. BigBrother wants LB to go swimming with him and LB is refusing to go. How about you go on and swim kid? You know, since we have that fucking pool in the backyard? Make me feel like it's - oh, I dunno - appreciated?
And what is up with this piece of shit laptop? I had to reformat the thing this weekend and now it's freezing up. Work, motherfucker! Work! Aaaagh!
This new schedule is really nice for spending time with Sweety but it is wrecking my blog life. I now see how easy it is push it to the wayside while doing other shit. Like listening to children.
How is it the boys can be so great one minute - so great that I just love them to death - and a few minutes later I'm ready to sharpen a broom and poke them and laugh while they run from me?
I will be so glad when LB's voice changes. Maybe his whine wouldn't bother me so much if it was a couple of octaves lower.
Despite this post, I am still in a very happy place. It's a fucking miracle.
I think that working not regular schedules for the past 6.5 years contributed to my feeling like shit all of the damn time. Now that I'm on a kind of normal one, I eat lunch at a "normal" time and when I get up, I go right to work after getting the boys up instead of going back to bed for 30 minutes. Since starting the new hours last week or so, I've lost 4 pounds! And the two weeks before that, I lost 10 just by not eating every waking moment. For the first time in my life, I'm trying to eat right on my own and not take pills or flat out starve and it seems to be working. It won't be the instant gratification that I like, but it will be good!
I'm really proud of LittleBrother(11). He had a baseball game last night (He made the All Star team! Woot!) and they lost 16 to 0. He played really well though. Made four outs and got on base. I was afraid that he'd be really pissy after the game but he wasn't. He was okay with the loss because he knew that he'd played well. The team that they played was all 13 year olds (except for one 11 y.o.) and our team is 11 & 12 so they basically walked all over us.
The lovely exwife did not appear at the game. She'd made a big deal the day before to Sweety, saying that she wanted to see LB practice the night before the game and she ended up dropping them off at our house before practice and she didn't go. I almost missed the game because of work but they had to move the game to another field because it was raining and I was able to get to the new field before the game started. LB was really happy to see me there and rode with me when we left. He has another game tonight and as much as I dislike laying eyes on her, I hope she shows up. Not holding my breath though.
BigBrother(13) has been wanting a Sims 2 game and he finally got one a couple of days ago. LittleBrother is a Webkinz fan and spends his spare time on the desktop playing that so I put the Sims on my laptop. While I was at work yesterday, BB played it til his eyes bled. Either I'm going to have to put the Sims on the desktop and make out a schedule for the boys to have specific times on the computer or I'm going to get another laptop. (Helloooo, MacBook!) Probably go the sharing desktop route. As much as I'd love a new puter.
We went to my sister's house last weekend and had a large time. My brother-in-law is retiring from the Army soon and threw a bbq for his friends. The kids stayed at the bbq long enough to eat and when they got bored, we took them all (the boys & niece) back to the house (just a few blocks away) to play video games and we went back to the party. The next morning we had leftovers for breakfast - meat and cake. It was good. The boys were having fun playing with Sylvie and didn't want to come home. I'm glad that they are comfortable with my family. We're going back in a couple of weekends and then my sister's family will be moving back to Oklahoma at then end of the month. I am so going to miss having them close.
Good grief. Being happy has made me boring as hell. I'll work on that. Maybe.
I'm happy.
This is so weird.
I can't remember the last time I really felt happy for more than 5 minutes. I'm going on day 3 or so. Maybe the meds are working or maybe it's my new job schedule or maybe it's that I feel like I can get out of the house and hang around other grownups without Sweety freaking out on me? Maybe it's a bit of all of the aforementioned. Whatever it is - I like it.
There were a few times today where I wanted to twist the boys' lips shut with bread ties just so I wouldn't have to listen to them pick-pick-pick at each other but I wasn't angry. It's nice to not walk around with a continuous undercurrent of angry pulsing through my veins. Instead, I have sparkly in my veins.
I'm gonna quit talking about it. I don't want to scare the happy away.
I mentioned to a friend my love of fizzing bath bombs and she has started making them! She sent some to me but I haven't had a chance to use them yet. I was going to tonight but I have to bathe Stinky and I don't like being in the tub after her. And I'll be too tired after washing her to sanitize the tub enough to sit my butt in it. When my friend's husband told Sweety that she was making bath bombs - Sweety told him that it must be nice to have a wife that has some initiative. I've been saying for awhile that I wanted to make them but that's as far as I've gotten. I'm such a slacker.
Why do I have a problem saying the word "vagina"? When my niece was here, she got a glance at Stinky Dog's flopping coochie (She's a big dog. It's big. You could probably stick ping pong ball in it if you greased it up.) and asked if I was sure that Stinky was a girl and not a boy. I told her yes and she asked how could I be sure. I said because Stinky doesn't have a penis. (See? No problem saying "penis") So she asked what Stinky had. (I know that she knows what Stinky has. I could tell from the gleam in her beady little eyes that she was enjoying that I was uncomfortable.) I said it was not a penis. Stinky has "girlie bits". And with that, Sylvie(9) gave an evil little chuckle and got in the shower. I was telling my sister about it and she said that it would have been okay to use the word "coochie". Vagina. Vagina. It just doesn't sound friendly.
Damn, it's been so long since I put anything here that I hardly know how to start.
I've was busy-busy until Sylvie left last week. I took her home on Tuesday and spent the night there. And since then? I don't know what I've been doing.
My work schedule has changed. I'm off on Wednesdays and the weekends (weekends! squee!) now. Work from 9 a.m. to 8 p.m. I go in an hour earlier than I had been and that has been hard to get used to but I really like getting off an hour earlier too.
Friday night, I went to a friend's house and got home a wee bit late. Sweety came home from work to find a messy house and two hungry dogs and no wife and was a bit irritated when I finally did get home. Stinky Dog didn't help matters. She shit in the fucking pool when he let them out to potty. She was getting ready to pee on the pool deck and he was spying on her. She freaked out when he yelled at her to move off the deck and swung around and pooped right in the damn water.
It was one of the first things he mentioned when I weebled in at 1 a.m. Thanks, Stinky. You're "my" dog and you have to act like this when I'm not here?
On Saturday we were busy having crazy make-up sex and I got an accidental, tiny episiotomy with the Penis of Doom. It's never good when your coochie gets ripped. Even a little bit.
I've been having a hard time sleeping and took some melatonin last night. Have you ever taken it? It gives me some seriously strange dreams. But having crazy dreams is better than no sleep at all, in my book.
Okay. I'm gonna scoot around Blogland and get as caught up as possible with you all before Sweety gets home!
The niece and I have been having a large time. Yesterday, we putt-putted our asses off in the heat and then had a late lunch at a Korean restaurant. Then we came home and took a nap! (Ha! I can talk her into napping with me!) Sweety had to go back to work that night and we tagged along and had a late supper at Waffle House. Today's been a lazy day. We goofed around at the mall and had lunch at a Chinese buffet. (And another nap!) One thing that's really nice about running around with Sylvie(9) is that she loves Asian food so I can have it without having to sit in the restaurant alone.
Meet Buddy.
