11/23/05

Lies I Have Told

Mr. Joe Fuel seems to have run upon one of those things that happens sometimes when you're dating. You're talking to someone, they seem to be into you, they tell you to call but then - nothing. I must admit I have been one of those girls who'd tell a guy to call and then would avoid their calls. Or even worse, lie to them about why I didn't want to see them.

Sweety: You may want to skip this post

I went out with one guy on one date and everything seemed to be going very well. He was good looking, conversation was easy, he had a job and just seemed to be a pretty decent fellow. The day after our date he sent an effing HUGE flower arrangement to my place of employment and then when I spoke to him to thank him he wanted to set dates for the next month. If he would've just said "you're welcome" and asked me out for that Friday night I would've went but the tone of the conversation kinda freaked me out so I told him he was a wonderful fellow but I was giving it another go with my exhusband.

There was another one I went out on a few dates with and then he lost his job. Actually, he was a car salesman and he got fired when his job couldn't cover him on their auto insurance because of a DUI. (i really know how to pick 'em, huh?) And just being jobless wouldn't be reason alone to drop him like a hot rock but when he started calling me multiple times a day at my job and I could tell he had been drinking I told him also that I was giving it another go with the exhusband.

God bless exhusbands...

By this time I'd wised up and figured out to never let a man find out where you live because he may think it's a nice idea to just drop by or give him your phone number. About this time a friend set me up on a blind date with a guy who was nice enough (we'll call him OCDGuy for here) but just didn't do anything for me. So, when he asked for my number I told him to just let me have his and I'd call him if I wanted to go do something sometime. Ha! A perfect plan - or so I thought. A couple of weeks pass and my work phone rings and somebody says 'hey, this OCDGuy! how are you doing?' and I ask him why the heck is he calling me at work. He said he thought I'd lost his number and he knew where I worked so he just decided to call me there. I told him I was busy every night in the foreseeable future.

I met one guy one night and didn't give him my phone number. He turned out to be a cop and he got all my info from my license plate. When he called me I didn't realize I hadn't given him my number but then a friend of mine who's phone was listed in my name got a few calls from some guy asking for me and I realized it was him. After I figured out what he'd done I just didn't answer my phone for a month or so. And I obeyed all traffic laws as well.

When I met Sweety I was dating someone I worked with and we'd been dating for around 4 months and I think we both knew it wasn't going anywhere but it was nice to have someone to go to the movies with on Saturday nights. After I met Sweety I knew he was "the one" so I just told the other guy it wasn't working out but I hoped we could maintain a pleasant working relationship. About 3 weeks later the guy called me to tell me he was going to be near my town the next day and he thought he'd swing by. I told him I was making plans to get married and I'd rather he didn't.

The main reasons I've ever lied and told someone to call when I didn't really mean it was because they either seemed like a nice person (for someone else) and I didn't want to squash their feelings in person (because I am a big chicken) or because they seemed like a nutjob and I didn't want to tell them to not call me to their face because I didn't know if they'd try to choke me or what. I just hate confrontation.

I think what's happened in Joe's situation is that he's a nice guy and the girl knows that but maybe she just didn't get that "spark" when they went out. So rather than tell him she's not interested and maybe say it in a manner that doesn't sound too kind, she's taking the avoidance way out because it's easier for her. When the time is right, you'll find the one and you'll both know it. I recommend serial dating until that time comes. Just get out there and date anything that moves and then maybe you'll meet Miss Right that much sooner.

9 comments:

MollyNormal said...

"When the time is right, you'll find the one and you'll both know it."

You realize that only happily married people say things like that?? LOL!!

I can relate on the thing about being chicken about squashing someone's feelings. I am exactly the same way!!

Chickie said...

I was totally taken by surprise when I met Sweety. I'd told a friend that my next husband would have to just land in my livingroom which is pretty much what happened.

layman said...

Gees, Chickie, when I was dating my wife and she told me she was going back to her ex-husband, I thought they made up. Now I know the real reason why she told me that. Damn, I had to give her exhusband a 100 bucks to pick a fight with her. He gladly accepted. I think I just lost a 100 bucks for nothing.

Midwestern City Boy said...

That is quite a list of excuses. I am really glad that I am married. But I think I knew it before California Girl did.

Joe Fuel said...

Thanks. I sure hope I didn't come across as some ridiculously creepy nerd. In any case, I appreciate the info.

Have a WONDERFUL Thanksgiving.

Chickie said...

Layman - But if you got the wife then you won, right?

MCB - My favorite thing about being married is not having to date people I don't know anymore.

Joe Fuel - Not creepy nerdish at all! I think it's much harder to date when you're a man than when you're a woman. Have a great day!

Ryann said...

ooh the lists of weird dates... brings back such fond memories, and future worries.

sheeesh you married people and your "faith"

lying is good for you! sometimes you just can't tell the puppy dog stalker guy why you might not be the love of his life...

Zube Girl said...

Oh, I hate, hate, hate confrontation, too and pulled the avoidance thing many times. Then again, it was pulled on me, too, so I figure all is justified in love.

Chickie said...

Ryann Rain - Lying can be used as a good tool. And my thinking is that puppy dog stalker guy deserves a lie or two.

Zube Girl - I had a guy tell me him and his exwife were getting back together once and then I started using that line. All is fair in love and war.