We keep our microwave on top of the icebox. And the icebox sits just inside the kitchen where the door to the garage is. I just realized if I opened the door to the microwave and turned all the lights off that Sweety would probably lose an eye (or whack himself in the head really good at the least) on the prong thing that holds the door closed when he walks into it. I could even hide in the pantry and witness the carnage. The idea came to me as I was getting something to drink and it tickled me so much that soda came out of my nose.

I was pretty pissy with him yesterday but thought I was over it today. Maybe, subconsciously, I'm not.

It's nice to know that the microwave can be used as my secret weapon.

Edited @ 10:47 p.m. - Sweety just called and offered a fine apology for yesterday. He is safe from the microwave.


KyuBall said...

"Shhh...be quite. I'm setting booty traps."

"You mean booby traps."

"That's what I said...shh, quite!"


Joey Polanski said...

What was Sweety apologizin fer? YOU was th one that was pissy yestrday!

An plannin ambushs tday!

Chickie said...

Kyuball - What a suitable exchange!

Joey Polanski - When I was being just a little pissy if he'd have left it alone I wouldn't have gotten REALLY pissy.

And as long as I don't follow through with the ambush it doesn't count.

Midwestern City Boy said...

I've said it before but it bears repeating. Sweety is a brave man. And a great catch. And he knows when to apologize an apology is necessary to save his eyesight. ;)

anne arkham said...

I'm gonna re-arrange my kitchen right now.

OldOldLady Of The Hills said...

Thank God he called! I had visions of seeing this story on the news! "Florida woman kills husband with door of microwave..." News at 11!
I'm deeply relieved, my dear Chickie.

Mike said...

I had never thought of a microwave as a lethal weapon before. Thanks, I will have to store that one away just in case I ever need it. Self defense of course.

bekah said...

Your mind works in an amazing way. Normal people would look at the microwave and think, "It's a microwave, for heating up food." And you say, "It's a microwave, for poking out eyeballs."

I am both scared and impressed by your thought process.

MollyNormal said...

I'm glad Sweety is save from the microwave, but if you ever do decide to take out his eye with it, would you please take pictures? :P

Michael said...

So why were you being pissy?

A good husband knows to apologize...fault is not something we should be concerned with, only the apology.


Amy said...

I'm curious (because I ALWAYS doubt a man's intentions) did he apologize before or AFTER he read this post?

Call me a pissy bitch but the apology ONLY counts (in my house, that is) if it is sincere! ;o)

Chickie said...

MCB - I know he's a great catch. That's why I try to temper the things I sometimes think of crazily saying or doing. And I don't know if he'd be as cute missing an eyeball.

Anne Arkham - An open dishwasher door is a good way to trip.

OOLOTH - If I killed someone you wouldn't see about it immediately. Only kill what you can eat - that's my motto.

Mike - Glad to be of service.

Bekah - These things just come to me. Sometimes it's a blessing and sometimes it's a curse.

Mollynormal - I would video it.

Michael - I'll elaborate on my pissiness in my next post.

Amy - He actually decided to apologize after reading my previous post "Words". After he read this post he had a few things to say too.