I had some seriously fucked up dreams last night. Shit that you would generally find in a nice horror flick. After Sweety left for work around 5 a.m. I couldn't go back to sleep because I was afraid I'd start having them again. I woke up from the dream when he was getting ready for work and when I dozed back off I had it again. Screw that. I'm just going to stay awake until the sun comes up and once it burns up the bad dream fumes that are in the atmosphere I'll take a nap. This is the price I pay for watching a show on the telly that involved burn victims.
After Sweety left I couldn't decide if I wanted to leave the bedroom door open (which is normally left closed) so I could turn on a light in the kitchen or if I wanted to lock my door and open the window so I could make a quick escape if something comes lurching after me. Then I figured I'd need to go rescue the kids if something did come crawling outta the dark after me and I entertained the notion of going to sleep on BB's floor but that would be too close to whatever lives under his bed. I finally decided on just shutting my own bedroom door and keeping the lamp handy to hurl at any zombie things that may come calling. Zombies are rotting right? The lamp should cripple them and give me enough time to get the kids and dogs out of here.
I just read what I wrote. I am a nutcase.
13 comments:
the great thing about fighting zombies is that they are slow. In all of the night of the living dead and the following sequels the living were able to just walk around the zombies.
just dont get cornered.
oh and get yourself a good sword.
on a serious note my wife has soo many bad dreams fighting things that i have bruises.
Here's a couple of important tips.
1. If you keep the covers up around your neck, they can't harm you. They need access to the neck to chop off your head or any soft fleshy body part from the neck down to eat you. It's a known fact that our skulls are too hard and their teeth break if they try.
2. What ever you do, and this is critical, never, ever hang your legs, feet, arms or hands over the side of the bed when your sleeping. The monsters under the bed will chop them off and eat them.
Trust me with this. I still have all my body parts so that's proof these techniques work.
Whenever I get scared when Mark's not around I get either a hockey stick, a bat, or one of Mark's katanas.
Oh, and I always make Indy stay in whatever room I'm in with me. Not that he'll protect me from an intruder (or a zombie, for that matter), but maybe his peeing on himself and barking will distract the intruder (again, or zombie) long enough that I can get Prinny and run away.
Well, you may be a nutcase, but you are a delightful one, Chickie!
I hate dreams that are so scary you are incredibly glad you are now awake, but SCARED to go back to sleep...Help!
Bo Snagley - I don't have a sword but I will hide a spatula under the mattress. Luckily, I don't move around when I'm dreaming. I just wake up frozen in terror.
BTExpress - Thanks for the tips! I'm a practicer of the second one but I didn't know that one about keeping the covers pulled up.
Bekah - It sounds like you will leave Indy behind as monster food. Say it ain't so!
TXSM - Get to feeling better soon! Yeah, nothing compares to a drug addled dream!
Mike - I think all the running around in dreams will wear you out. Especially if it's running for an unpleasant reason.
OOLOTH - Thank you :) I'd much rather have a scary dream and then forget about it quickly than wake up and keep seeing it when I close my eyes. Eesh.
Eh. Better him than me (or Prinny).
Ugh... the bad dream thing must be going around. That was me last weekend.
You don't need a lamp. You could take any zombie with your bare hands. Haven't you seen how their limbs fall off?
Bekah - Poor Indy.
Amy - Well, I wish it would go back to you :)
Anne Arkham - I'd probably puke to death if I had to touch one of the rotting undead. The lamp is handy enough.
You crack me up. Maybe you should get a night light. And where is Tiny Dog? I'm sure he'd protect you.
Michael
Jen - Could I send you some of mine? :)
Michael - We have a nightlight in another room and I started to fetch it but was afraid something would get me on my way to it.
Tiny dog protect me? Ha, she'd wait for the zombie to kill me and then she'd eat my head.
I definitely think a lamp is an appropriate weapon against a zombie. Just throw it right at the zombie's neck. That should maybe make its head fall off.
Zube Girl - And I thought that the heat might somehow cook it also.
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