10/17/05

Fun Planned

I am so ready to be off on Tuesday and Wednesday. I have some serious fun that will be happening.

I'm a plant torturer. I like to let a plant go without water til it's all limp and droopy and funny colored and then give it some water so I can actually watch it straighten up. And I'll give it a little bit of sun. It's almost like magic.

My plan is to water the plant and while I wait for the water and sun to work their magic I'll go outside and kick the shit out of some toadstools. I love kicking toadstools. It's neat to see how far you can get them to fly. There are six of them that I've had my eye on and they should be good and ready for kicking by tomorrow. I'll actually get dressed to kick the toadstools. It would just look too weird for someone to see me in my robe kicking them in the front yard.

I can't wait. I am one party animal.

I'm going to entertain my fantasy of what it will sound like to punt a pigeon. The gentle slope of a pigeon's breast cries for a foot arch to launch it into the air. And just the idea of those brilliant orange feet scrabbling through the air brings a smile to my face. Lucky for the pigeons of the world, circumstances have prevented me from fulfilling this fantasy.

Hmmm, I hate the knobby kneed sandhill crane and I spend time thinking about kicking pigeons. I must have some problem with poultry.

11 comments:

Bekah said...

I'd like a picture of you kicking a toadstool in your robe. That might make me actually piss myself laughing. The thought of it has me ALMOST there.

bec said...

Um...Chickie....yeah....I think it's time to see a therapist...I'm just sayin'........

LOL

annearkham said...

A pidgeon would fit nicely into that garbage disposal.

txsm said...

Yeah, hon, you really need to get out more....seriously.....LOL!

Bonanza Jellybean said...

I like destroying yard annoyances too, but I get far more pleasure out of things like the hose and ant beds. :)

Chickie said...

bekah - I quit kicking them in my robe because when I'm wearing my robe I have flip flops on. Have you ever got toadstool guts between your toes? Yech.

bec - This is my therapy! And I don't have to leave my house for it.

anne arkham - Oh, you are so right! It would be worth breaking the disposal to see those orange feet going down into it.

txsm - You should try toadstool kicking. It really is fun. I just found 2 more in the yard. It's like I'm having Christmas in October here!

bonanza jellybean - I love finding a good ant bed. I'll wait til they get it nice and big and then I'll just smooth it down. I even went and bought my own ant killer.

Zube Girl said...

Can I come hang out at your house?

Midwestern City Boy said...

This would definitely be a Kodak moment. Sweety should take a picture.

MollyNormal said...

Chickie - if I saw a toadstool I would definitely kick it. But I've never actually seen one, so in a pinch, I like to pop bubble wrap. It's totally theraputic.

L said...

I always accidentally kill my plants....

Chickie said...

zube girl - Only if you promise to kick a toadstool and put a potatoe in the garbage disposal!

mcb - It would be a Kodak moment but my therapy is way to private. I wait til the neighborhood is quiet before I unleash my feet of fury on the things in the yard.

mollynormal - I LOOOOOVE bubblewrap. I'll fight the kids over it.

l - Are you sure it's an accident? Who needs plants anyway?