11/3/05

Things That Creep Me Out

When a woman has toes so long that they hang over the front of her sandals.
Ack! You know the kind I mean, the ones that look like fingers. Please keep those things covered. Or have your shoes specially made.

Adults with tiny teeth.
When people have little bitty perfect teeth that look like pieces of white corn it freaks me out. I figure they need to have more jaw power to bite so if they wanted to they could gnaw my hand off real quick if they got the idea in their head. Or yank out my jugular vein before I could even blink.

When children talk in their sleep.
It always sounds like they're possessed or something. I imagine that their Dark Lord is using the time that they are unconscious to program them for the next day.

When I'm in bed and something dances across the roof.
My first thought is never "squirrel". It is always "gargoyle! a big one!". Even though this is probably impossible, it still makes my heart beat fast.

8 comments:

Fidget said...

tiny teeth freak me out too.. and my children often talk like possessed omen sounding children of the corn freaks - i hate that too!

Chickie said...

Fidget - The children talking in their sleep freaks me out worse than anything. I have to stick my head under my pillow because I can't even go back to sleep if there's a chance that I might hear them doing it again.

MollyNormal said...

Ditto on the toe thing. Have you ever seen Paris Hilton's toes? GEEZ! They're as long as her damn fingers and SOOO creepy.

shannon said...

every one of those (except the kids thing since i don't have kids and was the kid who talked in her sleep...).

i sell shoes, do you know how hard it is to tell a woman to WEAR A BIGGER SIZE!!! aka, YOUR size!!! women are bitches about shoe size. i've had to get creative on how to tell them to go up.

bekah said...

I'm laughing so hard at the thought of a "gargoyle! a big one!" HAAHAA

Zube Girl said...

I HATE things on the roof. I always think, "Killer ghosts!"

Midwestern City Boy said...

That's one of the net things about living in relatively new house without any mature trees around. Nothing ever gets up on the roof. If I hear anything coming from up their I'm calling the cops.

Chickie said...

Mollynormal - She's like a size 11. I've noticed in alot of beach pictures she has part of her feet in the sand. I think she's trying to make them look smaller.

Shannon - Sometimes it sucks to be the messenger, huh? I'd hate to have to deal with people like that.

Bekah - You laugh now, wait til one rips you limb from limb someday. There is a tiny chance they could exist.

Zubegirl - I'm glad that I'm not alone in my assumption.

MCB - We only have one tree left so the roof-sounds are not as frequent. Thankfully.