I Suck

No HNT today. Osbasso had a good idea of giving gifts to 3 bloggers but my procrastination coupled with having kids here every waking second of my days off led to no creativity. The thoughtful Sasha gave me a gift! I am not worthy but I am appreciative.

Oh, hey. The title of this post reminds me of a conversation Sweety and I had.

Setting: In the car and I've just gotten off my cell phone.

Me: This phone is a piece of shit. The last few times I've spoken to someone I haven't been able to hear them.

Him: Maybe you should turn the volume up.

Me: It's up all the way! My hearing must be going. Getting old I guess.

Him: Will you keep on sucking cock like you have been, even when you get old?

Me: Nope.

Him: What! What do you mean? You're going to stop? (at this point he sped up the car and unbuckled my seat belt in preparation of shoving me out of the car)

Me: Oh no, I'll be even better at it in a few years. I'll be able to pull my dentures out and REALLY get down on it.

Him: Wow, you'd gum me? You're so nice.


Sasha said...

oh honey, you're welcome! sorry you haven't had time to think about this week's HNT project though... there's always next week!

and oh, you linked me to osbasso's site ;)

Chickie said...

Sasha - Agh. Link is fixed! I'm glad you were the first to comment!

scorpy said...

See? It's that kind of deep discussion that keeps a relationship on the right track. Also? That teeth-falling-out thing? Should give him the idea to bring you lots and lots of edible treats, supposedly to show you his love, but really intending to speed the demise of your current chompers. ;)

BO Snagley said...

what happens if you loose all of your teeth except for one on the top middle and one on the bottom middle.

Fuzzy britches is awaiting her eye patch.

Dirk the Feeble said...

I told my girlfriend last night that she had a lot of skills and talents. She responded by saying she wants to be a professional cocksucker.

I think I'm in love.

Amy said...

OK, that is too freaking funny. My sister used to be in the habit of saying, "You suck!" so I started replying with, "Only when I'm asked nicely" or "Yes, I do, but I won't swallow." Then she'd scream "EWWWWWWW" but more importantly, she stopped telling me how much I sucked. ;o)

Chickie said...

Scorpy - He did offer to stop for ice cream after this conversation.

Bo Snagley - If I only had 2 teeth left I'd knock them out myself. I like things to be even.

I have my prototype chicken eye patch done. I want to wait til I get it perfect before I present it to Fuzzy Britches.

Armaedes - That is one fine woman you have there. I bet she and I would get along.

Amy - Reverse psychology works every time!

kat said...

You guys crack me up...lol

Bonanza Jellybean said...

I have a tear in my eye at the beautiful example of love and adoration you gave us. Really. That's true love. Forget flowers and stuff- gums are the way to someone's heart. :)

Chickie said...

Bonanza Jellybean - For his birthday, I may pull out a couple of teeth.

Startingnew said...

LOL...that was the best laugh I had all night, thanks!! needed one!!

Chickie said...

Kat - Sometimes after we're done talking I'll think "Did we really just have that conversation?" We talk about some weird shit.

Startingnew - Glad to be of service!

Midwestern City Boy said...

I know I've said it before but you guys are meant for each other.