Oh motherfuck! Some effing asshole threw a motherfucking ROCK at ME in my own car while I was driving home today! It was dark and I was zipping along, on the phone with my Mom, and suddenly something whacked the windshield right in front of my face. The sound was loud enough I felt my eardrums shake. Broke the fucking windshield of course. Cocksucker. I hope the fucker that did it dies a horrible, fiery death. I am not kidding. It could have knocked a hole in my pretty little head. Agh, bastard.

And then I walk through the door and see this shit:
Rotten little turd
In case you need an explanation, that's Tiny dog fucking EATING Stinky's bed. I wrap it in a trash bag in case Tiny feels like taking a piss on it and she worked the cover off and chewed through the damn bag and started in on the foam rubber. Ungrateful whore.

I need to go calm the eff down before I stroke out.


anne arkham said...

I'd offer a hug, but I'm a little afraid of you right now.

bekah said...

Calm down with some Bacardi.

Will your insurance cover the cost of the windshield repair if you report it to the police? I'd suggest calling the sheriff's deptartment and reporting vandalism.

KyuBall said...

My brother had someone drop a coconut off an overpass into his windshield, once.

He had me drive the truck home. Not fun...tiny shards of glass kept hitting me in the face.

Sorry about your day. BTW - the plastic bag goes AROUND the dog to be most effective.

Just kidding. :)

The Recovering Straight Girl said...

That sucks. Sorry dude.

OldOldLady Of The Hills said...

This has not been a good day at all, Chickie!! Whoever that creep was that threw that rock,,,Geeeeessse! Do you suppose he realized the possible consequesnce of his act??? What an asshole!

And Tiny dog...What's up with that chewing thingy..(lol) Sorry...she makes me laugh!

Mike said...

Sorry about your windshield. Some people are just plain fucking rock throwing crazy bastards.

Tiny Dog is kind of a terrorist, isn't she?

Chickie said...

Gee, Anne, thanks. I appreciate the sentiment.

Bekah - Replacing the windshield will be free. And we did file a report. I stopped for gas afterwards and there were some officers at the gas station. Sweety had called them to report it so I got the report number.

Kyuball - I'm glad it wasn't something from an overpass. It would've went through the window in that case. Someone threw this from some woods on the side of the road. I'm sure they're dying from a snake bite right now.

Maybe I'll give Tiny a bag to fight her way out of.

RSG - Thanks!

OOLOTH - I figure it was just some dumbass kids. It's good that my windshield is thick.

Sweety says that Tiny is trying to dig her way out of the house.

Mike - Apparently the fucking rock throwing crazy bastards haven't discovered the therapeutic power of putting eggs in garbage disposals. I hope they find the light soon.

I don't know if Tiny is a terrorist or just fucking insane.

Anonymous said...

Oh my god, what a horrible day for you. Girl, I hope you got some rest and relaxed a little bit. I seriously hope the person who did that to your car knows how to run fast cuz you'll kill 'em if you catch 'em...lol


ChalkJock said...

Rock AND foam Terrorists in a single day ?


My sympathies

Renee said...

What a fucking jerkwad!

Also sorry the doggie is eating the bed but she sure is cute!:-)

Crazy.Spoiled.bLitch. said...

That's happened to me before!!! Some jackass was throwing rocks at my brand new with dealer tags car as I tried to merge on the Dallas North Tollway during rush hour. Sorry I cut him off to get on the freeway but I was trying to merge and he wouldn't let me. Ya either move or get run over in this town. Other drivers saw what the guy was doing at let me over and cut him off... but he still kept on. I called 911 and as we when thru the toll booths four Texas State troopers nabbed him. Ha! Sorry about your windshield.

Chickie said...

Kat - If I caught them, I'd rip off their throwing arm.

Chalkjock - I can handle rock throwers but the foam terrorist has really hurt my heart.

Renee - Tiny dog's cute bank is starting to run mighty low here.

CSB - Whoa. That was one crazy fucker you were dealing with. At least I wasn't under repeated attack!

txsm said...

I know exactly how you feel!!!!! I felt the same fierce anger when those fucktards stole my Santa out of our front yard!!!!!

Chickie said...

TXSM - It just makes you wonder what the fuck are people thinking!

Zube Girl said...

Oh my GOD! What an asshole throwing a rock at your window! That could've ended really horribly.

Sometimes I just hate people.

Chickie said...

Zube Girl - I got really freaked out thinking about all the different things that could have happened (all of them ended with me dying horribly) so I'm just pretending it didn't happen. Until I get in my car and look at the hole.

Midwestern City Boy said...

That sounds horrible. I'm glad that you went hurt.

And whats up with Tiny eating everything in the house. Aren't they supposed to chew less once they get older. I'd start making her stay in her cage until she gets it out of her system.

Chickie said...

MCB - Tiny really outdid herself today. She will be staying in her cage when we're gone for the next little while.