4/22/06

It All Works Out In The End

"Hey, I got your email. So your exhusband really died, huh?"

"Yes. He had a heart attack last weekend and his housekeeper didn't find him til Thursday."

"That's too bad. He had dogs didn't he?"

"Yeah, three."

"Poor dogs. What's going to happen to them?"

"I think someone took them."

"Sooooo...Did they EAT his body?"

"Actually, they did."

"Bwhahahahahahaha! Heh, that was the first thing that came to my mind when I read your email."

"When I found out about it I knew it would please you."

Note: My exhusband is not the dearly departed.

11 comments:

Chickie said...

I'm figuring two days. Isn't that about how long it takes for a dead body to get smushy?

From what I understand, they did quite a number on him.

Anonymous said...

Oh MAN!! If only it had been an EX WIFE...*I* would have been pleased!

Anonymous said...

I've read about things like this happening before but it mist be weird to know someone who was related to the "affected individual".

Anonymous said...

OMG you've given me such hope.

Chickie said...

Bex - I would be crying tears of joy if I could write a post like that!

MCB - I knew a guy who found his grandpa dead in his hunting cabin. The really bad part was when he moved the body - a possum came crawling out of a hole in his side.

I feel since I've known two people who've had loved ones eaten that the chance of me dying and being nibbled on by Stinky and Tiny are slim.

Anne Arkham - You need to:
1) Position your microwave just right.
2) Make sure that Butkus and Bud are hungry.
3) Come to Florida for a week long vacation.

OldLady Of The Hills said...

EWWWWWWW Quite Gruesome! Did they really eat him???? UGH!

Anonymous said...

Would you rather that the dogs starved? Meat is meat. My mum taught me it was Wicked to waste food.

The Phosgene Kid said...

Now there's a dark turn of mind.

Joey Polanski said...

Thinks th dog, gnawin on Mastrs fingr: "Funny ... I usta get smackd fer this."

Anonymous said...

That's disgusting... really, really disgusting.

Really. Disgusting.

I feel so bad for those dogs... I'd hate to have to eat raw, rotting human.

Chickie said...

OOLOTH - I kid you not.

Cissy Strut - I'd definitely rather that the poor canines didn't starve. Knowing the dearly departed as I did, I kinda hope he wasn't dead when they started gnawing.

The Phosgene Kid - You mean you wouldn't have asked?

Joey Polanski - Wonder what was going through their minds if they made it to the liver?

Bekah - I bet the dogs thought it was a treat. It was in Texas and it's been kinda hot, maybe it was kinda beef-jerky-ish.