Fly On The Wall

Things that you would've heard in our house tonight:

It's not a fucking Christmas present. You don't need to peek under it and THEN yank it off. Just pull it OFF!

Go heat up the damn wax some more, bitch.

Ow ow ow ow! Mother fucker!

Thirty seconds! You're supposed to wait thirty seconds before you yank it off! How the fuck are you counting? One...two...three...thirty?

Hey, Donkey, do you even know how the count to thirty? I think that was only 17 seconds.

Sweety's back was waxed tonight! Big fun! For some reason, making him cry and eat his pillow just brings out the maniacal laughter in me.

The fact that I was laughing so hard that I was crying during the entire hour-long ordeal did not make him any happier.

I should open a salon.


Titus said...

I must be really getting old Chickie. I don't understand half the things you young people do for foreplay.

Bex said...

"KELLY F'IN CLARKSON!!" Don'tcha remember that from 40 Year Old Virgin! "F me in the ASSSSSSSSS"!!!

I envision that.

Found a new blog for you: http://wackymommy.org/

Wacky Mommy said...

Heh heh heh heh heh. Can I play that game here? I'd like to.

OldOldLady Of The Hills said...

LOL, LOL...Poor Sweety---put through the tortures of the damned!

Joey Polanski said...

That gims me a brillyant idea: a more guy-frendly back-waxin kit.

I think Ill call it Man Wax Off.

yep, it's me.... said...

i LOVE it

bekah said...

I don't think your salon would do too well if you're cackling with maniacal laughter the whole time you're waxing someone... but good luck!

BO Snagley said...


Cissy Strutt said...

Next time, threaten Sweetie with the full back crack & sack wax (sorry to be crude, but that is the technical term) then he might be grateful you're just doing his ... um ... sweater removal

Chickie said...

Titus - Don't give yourself a headache trying to figure it out!

Bex - Oooh! I like the blog!

Wacky Mommy - I've got 1/2 a tub of wax left if you'd like it :)

OOLOTH - The best part was when he wanted me to stop but I couldn't because then he'd look like a mangy dog.

Joey Polanski - Heh, it took me a minute to get that one.

Me - It was the most fun I'd had in awhile.

Bekah - But if I'm cackling then I'm happy and don't people who are happy with their jobs do the best work?

Bo Snagley - It's not that bad. It was all too far from his head to kill him.

Cissy Strut - Ha! Actually, I did threaten with that and he started to whimper.

patti_cake said...

Yeah you should open a salon, you have such excellent bedside manner LOL I would have been DYING too! 'Cept Stacy would never let me wax a thing on him!

Midwestern City Boy said...

After reading this post, I'm keeping what few hairs I have no matter where they are.

How often does back waxing night come around?

Chickie said...

Patti_Cake - It was hard to pull the wax strips off because I was shaking and laughing so hard.

MCB - We do it maybe every 3-4 months. He's not woolly-mammothy, just a few crazy hairs.

L said...

heh heh