One morning, many moons ago (when I lived in Texas), I walked to the icebox to get something to eat. On the icebox I had this mail-holder thing that you put envelopes in and it was full of mail. On on of the envelopes, there was something much like this:
The thing on the envelope's eyes were closed (napping, I guess) and it was totally sitting on it's feet so it looked like a gigantic booger. I'd never seen anything like this mysterious green blob before and the first thing that came into my mind was "Tiny aliens! Wow! Where are the rest of them?" I poked it with the corner of an envelope but it didn't move. Then I looked on the countertops but didn't find any of his brethren and when I was fixing to scoop it into a glass for further study, it opened it's eyes and hopped away. That's when I realized it was frog.
I'm in the shower last night and had propped my foot up on the edge of the tub to wash it when I noticed a blob of something on the tub floor. It looked like cement. And my first thought was "What the hell is this that just fell out of my coochie? Is it gonna move?!" I turned off the shower so I could examine it closely and found that it was a glop of the stuff that I use to scrub my face with.
I should probably start going with more plausible ideas as to what things are when they take me by surprise. Not everything is an alien baby.
I've got a question for you - At what age is a kid old enough to spend the night home alone?