When I first saw it, I thought it was an alien. I like aliens. Then I found out that this is the emblem for the "Flying Sp@ghett1 M0nster". (I fucked up the spelling so if someone googles it they won't land here.) What is this mythical creature? The Flying Sp@ghett1 M0nster is invisible and created the universe. After reading about its origins, I ordered the emblem and its been living happily on my car's butt for weeks now.
A couple of weeks ago, Sweety calls me outside because he said that NeighborGirl had a question for me. I was busy cooking dinner and didn't want to go outside but I did and she wanted to know what the emblem meant. I told her to google it and went back inside. Sweety told her that it was the polar opposite of having a Jesus Fish on your car.
Fast forward to yesterday. Sweety gets home and the NeighborGirl's parents are outside of their house and call him over. (Yeah, they are these neighbors.) They want to know what the Flying Sp@ghett1 M0nster is and Sweety just tells them that I am a different kind of cat. They tell Sweety that NeighborGirl told them that I told her to google it so I'm guessing that they already knew all there was to know before they questioned Sweety but nothing else was said about the emblem or its meaning. Their conversation with Sweety veers towards the cuntofanexwife and NeighborWife says that maybe this new man is COAEW's path to a better life and being a better person. She asks Sweety, "If Chickie asked you to go to church with her, you would, right?". He laughed and told her that he would but that would never be an issue. She responds with, "Chickie doesn't believe?! (insert horrified gasp here) Sweety responds that he doesn't feel like it all holds much water either and that he doesn't discuss religion or politics. He says that he feels that the COAEW is being hypocritical and that she's been a huge bitch to me for the past 6 years. Why, now that she's "found religion" and wants to be friends, should I bother? NeighborHusband remarks that "two wrongs don't make a right" and at that point Sweety walked away. You know, I'm not much of a turn the other cheek sort of person. Unless it's my butt cheek so I can donkey kick you while you're kissing it.
Someday, I will have a 10 acre lot with a house smack dab in the middle of it.
I won't get into it all, but the COAEW has really been stomping all over my goat the past few weeks. Not just stuff that I bitch about here but other shit too. I said awhile back that I'd been yanking Sweety's chain and telling him that I was going to rat out the COAEW about sending her youngest kid to the same school that LittleBrother(10) goes to but that I wasn't really going to do it. Well damn, I was pissed off enough to do it the other day and Sweety asked me not to. After a few hours, I told him that I'll keep my yap shut but I'd rather tattle. (I have changed the whole way that I pick up LB on Tuesdays and Wednesdays just so I don't have to converse with that fried cunt. Why should I feel the need to do that when she doesn't even belong at the school? She has fucked up my chi.) Later, Sweety tells me that to prove to me that good things happen to people that do good things (or don't stir up trouble) that he will get me an iPhone this weekend. Doesn't sound like a reward to me. It sounds like a bribe. I'm not getting the phone anyway. I want to wait until you can use the phone for MMS messages and to record videos - then I'll let him buy me one. Gee, I am such a bitch. (When he mentioned getting me a dog in exchange for my silence that seemed really wrong. Like it would be really wrong accept a living being for doing something nice. But an electronic device? I'll take that.)
A few days ago it rained for just about 24 hours. During that time, about a dozen frogs found their way into our pool. I tried to scoop them out with the net because I knew that the chlorinated water would kill them but they were stupid and
I'm staying out of the pool til I'm sure that all of the frog sperm has been filtered out.