Am I Alone in My Constant Quest for Blog-Fodder?

Hey, I'm on my way home. What are you doing?

Can't talk right now. I'm suffering.

Um, okay. Will you be alright?

Yes. Gotta go. Bye.
The whole way home I'm thinking that I'll be able to spin whatever Sweety has done to himself into a nice, fat blog post. He must have been doing something that he shouldn't have been to hurt himself and that's why he didn't want to tell me over the phone.

I go into the living room and he's all laid back on the couch. I'm looking for a bandage or ice pack or something but all I see is a wine cooler (yeah, that's how we roll) in his hand.

So what happened?! (in my mind I've already decided that I'll type up the whole story, highlighting Sweety's anguish, while he's in the shower so he won't know that I'm talking about him)


What happened to you today? Do you need to go to the doctor?

What the hell are you talking about?

On the way home, you said you couldn't talk to me because you were suffering. I figure you must have really been hurting and needed to get off the phone to patch yourself up.

No, you dumbass. I said I was swiffering. I was mopping where your filthy dogs live.
Son of a bitch. I don't have anything interesting to tell you except that my socks don't stick to the floor anymore.


Thomas said...

I can usually spin ANYTHING into a blog, but lately my life has been so freaking boring that I can't seem to turn it into anything but the giant turd it is


Chickie said...

TV - I'll have a nice post idea and I'll even say it aloud to try and keep from forgetting it. Get in front of the keyboard and - Poof! The idea runs away.

Amy said...

No, you are not alone. I've got nothing these days.

And, I do that too... great idea and somehow the keyboard acts like
"great idea" repellent.

Chickie said...

Amy - Maybe our blog muses are out having a party somewhere without us?

patti_cake said...

Swiffering IS suffering to me! I HATE housework!

Chickie said...

Patti_Cake - I'm with you on that bus!

shades of purple said...

That was a great post! It made me smile real big! BTW how's the dog next door?

Chickie said...

Shades of Purple - Thank you :) The neighbordog is still barking his guts out. I sent an email to the city animal control to see if there was a law against leaving him outside all of the time but nobody has responded yet.