2/22/06

Another Guest Post By Tiny

Baths Can Kiss My Freshly Squeezed Ass
By: Tiny Dog Oy



Guess what I got last night? A bath. And not just the regular bath that I'm accustomed to. The female biped had noticed that I was scooching my ass around the yard and decided that it was time to empty my anal glands. (By the way, the link there just describes how it is done. I wouldn't allow photos to be taken of the actual event. I have my pride.) Oh. My. Word. She did that horrible act about 30 seconds after taking this picture:

Fuck baths

I don't like baths as it is but having my ass violated was really icing on the cake last night. Maybe it was a good thing though. Now when I go potty, I can go faster. I think I was, uh, constipated or something before. Or maybe I've just eaten too many Lincoln Logs. I love Lincoln Logs. And pencils. And paper.

I plan on getting back at the human for bathtime by chewing another hole in the wall when she goes on vacation this summer. One thing that I've learned from living here is that it's okay to wait on making revenge.

It seems that some of you people didn't care much for my glorious voice in my first post; I've been doing some singing when the humans are gone and Stinky dog Tasha says that I'm sounding much better.

My voice may not always be pretty but it gets the job done. After about 20 minutes of screaming at the human, she'll put me in the bed with her. But lately she's started sticking these orange things in her ears and I think they keep her from hearing me. Whenever I get the chance, I try to find those orange things and chew them up. So far I've managed to mangle 4 pairs of them. She throws them away when she catches me with them. I wish she'd let me keep them. They are so tasty.

I must go inspect every inch of the floor now and see if there are any small things on it that I'd like to chew.

Tiny dog out.

13 comments:

Mike said...

Tiny you are one tough cookie if you can stand having your ass violated and a bath all at the same time. Keep the faith baby.

Duce said...

Tiny, I must say that you're one sexy bitch when you're all wet. Please, darling, call me.

littlefeet said...

omg...soo fucking funny...LOL

peace...

Bonanza Jellybean said...

Oh, you poor thing... glad to see you're ploting revenge. You rpost also made me realize that animals can indeed use the Internet, which explains A LOT at my house.

Chickie said...

Mike - I'm not really a tough cookie. At 4 pounds I don't have much control over my destiny.

Duce - I've gotta break up with Stinky dog first. I do love humping her head.

Monkey - Thank you :)

Bonanza Jellybean - Just wait and see what kind of mischief your animals cause once they learn to load photos. The people that live with me are gonna pay, big time.

Amy said...

Poor Tiny. I have to tell you that it really takes a strong person to squeeze a dog's ass. Personally, I couldn't do it, so in my house I guess your ass would just explode eventually.

Good luck on the whole revenge thing!

Joey Polanski said...

Dont nock th hole baff + ass squeeze, Tiny Dog. Th female biped already thinks yer head smells GRATE! She jus wants yer OTHR end t smell grate too! Humer her.

txsm said...

Ok, I'm totally LMAO....which isn't good considering I'm still trying to recover from the 3 weeks of throat hell....I've given myself a coughing fit....too funny!

Jessica said...

Poor Tiny! I'm sorry you were so violated!

anne arkham said...

Good work Tiny Dog.

Chickie said...

Amy - You would eventually cave in to my ass's suffering and squoosh it. I'm too cute to suffer.

Joey Polanski - It suddenly makes sense to me! Heh, wait til some person tries to sniff my butt, I've gotta surprise for them.

TXSM - Get well soon!

Redneck Eskimo - It's okay. This wasn't as bad as the time the male biped farted on me. But that's a whole other story and I don't want to dig up painful memories.

Anne Arkham - Thank you. There's more where this came from.

him said...

That is a great picture

Chickie said...

Him - Thanks!