I'm chomping at the bit to participate in Stuff Portrait Friday. Renee is hosting is this week and one of the things to show is your dishes. I just got some new ones. We have been dining off of our hodge-podge collection of dishes that we both brought from our previous households and we didn't have a full set of either one. We've been looking at dishes and silverware every time we go somewhere for the last couple of months and couldn't agree on anything. So this morning while cruising around Target, I decided to make some executive decisions involving the dishes and cutlery. I even got new glasses. I am quite pleased. I'm going to take all the old stuff, put it in a big bucket, and smash it with a sledgehammer. I can't wait.
All of the new dishes have been put in their new home and I keep going back to peek at the order that is in the cupboard. I've also cleaned under our bed and put all of our shoes in boxes so I stop to take a peek under there when I walk past too.
To get our old tile off the floor and make way for the wood floor Sweety is having to break it up with a sledgehammer. It's ceramic tile and the sound of it breaking makes me want to cut my ears off. I can't stand the sound of ceramic scraping together; it makes my teeth hurt. And the sound of it breaking is pretty bad. But it'll be worth it once we get the new floor in.
I just found out that my friend in Texas was fired from her job today. She'd been off work for 2 weeks because she had a hysterectomy and on her second day back was canned for complete bullshit stuff. I hope the little toad that had a problem with her dies a horrible fiery death.
The EW called Sweety yesterday and mentioned that her 3 year old crumbsnatcher wouldn't eat any food. He'll only drink milk and she doesn't know why. First off, why mention that to Sweety? He's just gotta make sure his own kids don't starve. And second off, has is not occurred to her that maybe the kid is doing this for attention since there's a baby around now? I'm no psychologist but that was my first thought. She'll probably just let him suck on a bottle til his teeth rot out.
The other night at work we couldn't answer the phone because our system was down. Our new supervisor took this time to have meetings with each of us. Mine went like this:
Sup: You seem to be very efficient and self motivated. Or am I wrong? Do you prefer being pushed in your job.
Me: No, I'm good with they way things are. Thank you for asking though.
Sup: What are your goals here?
Me: (thinking - hmm, can't tell her I want to quit and float in my pool in 2 years) I'm pretty much where I want to be. The hours are good and you need people to answer the phones, right?
Sup: Well yes, but what motivates you?
Me: Honestly, it is the fear of, well gee for lack of a better word, I'll say it's the fear of confrontation. I just want to come in and do my job well enough so that you never have to say anything to me about it. Because if you have to say something then I'm going to freak out and I don't like freaking out.
And then I explained how I had this schedule to help with my family life and that's why I wasn't interested in doing any special projects or advancing. It was probably the most uncomfortable meeting I've ever had.
8/31/05
Titleless For Now
I can't believe the devastation that the hurricane left behind. I thought it was bad last year when we got smacked with 3 of them but at least we weren't hiding in the attic while the water level crept up.
Tasha is still sleeping off the after affects of getting her teeth cleaned yesterday. Tiny dog is chewing all over her and she's not even moving. She had to have one tooth pulled. I'm glad that was all. I've had her for 2 years and this is the first time her teeth have been done. I don't know how long it was before that. I'm going to start brushing them now.
The whole at-home acid face peel went well. I didn't leave it on there any longer than the instructions said and managed to not get any kind of skin burn. I'd like to go somewhere and have it done but that would require making appointments and leaving the house to interact with strangers. Things to be avoided if at all possible.
BB is due for a new bike and I'm gonna try to get him one that I can ride too. I need one and am hoping to get lucky and buy one for both of us.
Sweety made me promise last night, if he died, that I would stay in the boys' lives as much as their mother would allow. Well gee, of course. I told him though if anything like that happened she probably wouldn't be too keen on the idea. If the situation ever arises my plan is to try and buy the boys from her and take them to Oklahoma with me. I told Sweety to just be careful so I never have to deal with it.
Tasha is still sleeping off the after affects of getting her teeth cleaned yesterday. Tiny dog is chewing all over her and she's not even moving. She had to have one tooth pulled. I'm glad that was all. I've had her for 2 years and this is the first time her teeth have been done. I don't know how long it was before that. I'm going to start brushing them now.
The whole at-home acid face peel went well. I didn't leave it on there any longer than the instructions said and managed to not get any kind of skin burn. I'd like to go somewhere and have it done but that would require making appointments and leaving the house to interact with strangers. Things to be avoided if at all possible.
BB is due for a new bike and I'm gonna try to get him one that I can ride too. I need one and am hoping to get lucky and buy one for both of us.
Sweety made me promise last night, if he died, that I would stay in the boys' lives as much as their mother would allow. Well gee, of course. I told him though if anything like that happened she probably wouldn't be too keen on the idea. If the situation ever arises my plan is to try and buy the boys from her and take them to Oklahoma with me. I told Sweety to just be careful so I never have to deal with it.
8/29/05
Care For A Drumstick?
These were strolling around in my yard this afternoon. The pompous, arrogant, I-can-walk-in-the-middle-of-the-road-cause-I'm-a-threatened-species, Florida Sandhill Crane. This is the first time I've seen them NOT in the middle of the road.
These birds usually travel in packs of 3 or more. Most often they are walking back and forth across some road that I'm trying to drive down. I think they know it is illegal to run over them so they like to take their sweet time when they're crossing the road. It is not uncommon for the first bird to get across the street to turn around and cross back to the other side while bird 3 is still coming in the opposite direction.
The first time I saw these I didn't know what they were and I entertained the idea of gassing it and seeing if I could smack one hard enough to make it's legs pop apart at the knees. I didn't understand why traffic was at a total stop with nobody even honking their horn or driving close enough to spook them. After telling Sweety my little fantasy he informed me that they are threatened and a huge ticket would be had if I did run over one. And I would also be labeled an animal abuser.
If I ever hit one I know to pick it's feet out of my grill before the body is out of my rearview mirror.
I Think Not
I just had to pull Stinky dog away from a box of wood flooring that she was chewing on. She's NEVER chewed on anything before. Tiny must be a bad influence. This crap better stop or I will have a new dog-skin purse with a matching cell phone cover.
Little Thoughts
Another downside to having the computer in the toyroom: if someone were to walk right up to our back porch they could see my naked self. I will be so glad when we get a fence.
I've been thinking about some weird stuff the last few days.
If I could do it over again, I don't think I'd touch my Grandma when she was at the funeral home. I'd never touched a dead person before and I've been having some way effed up dreams about how cold her hands were. And some major guilt over the fact that I didn't call her more before she died. Gee, of course I'd be feeling guilty about not calling her before she died. Not like I could call her afterwards.
Why is it that after hearing a girl name for the last little while I think to myself "Oooo, I'll have to put that on my baby girl name list!"? What list? I don't have a list.
Have you ever heard a song and instantly been reminded of an unpleasant time? Nothing like listening to the country station at 2 a.m. to have that happen.
I guess if you go to the drugstore at the aforementioned hour and spend 30 minutes in the facial cleanser/wrinkle smoother section a salesperson will eventually start tailing you to see if you are shoving products in your big pink purse. I'll get back with you on how well the at home face peel works. I smell disaster. Or maybe it's just the scent of old skin burning away to be replaced with shiny new stuff.
Tiny dog is wanting to play and Stinky just isn't having any of it. What a bossy little troll Tiny can be. Cute though. I take that back. The destructive little bitch is trying to eat a hole in the carpet. I guess she must find something to replace the wall. I'm gonna have to let her see me spray the carpet with some of the bitter apple stuff like I did on the wall to keep her away from it. I can just put my hand on that bottle of stuff now and she runs and hides. Sweety says I maced her. I think that's a rather violent way of phrasing it.
Stinky was running around barking her head off earlier. I spent 10 minutes telling her to calm down and shut up before I remembered that her way of letting me know that she's gotta poop is to bark her head off. Glad I remembered before she exploded.
LB started to cry this morning because his folder wasn't in his backpack. Sweety calmed him down by telling him it must still be at school. My first instinct was to swaddle him in a soft blanket and stick him in the trunk until it was time to leave. And then I was horrified that I'd even entertained such a thought. So I hid in the back room til they left. Used to, that kind of thought wouldn't bother me. I must be getting soft in my old age.
I started my diet by eating oatmeal this morning. Just call me Goldilocks. I've GOT to lose some weight. I'm about 10 pounds away from my heaviest. Sweety was kind enough to stock up on SlimFast and tuna kits for me this weekend. Yum yum.
I'm off next Monday. I'll have a 3 day weekend. I think we're going to smash the tile out of the kitchen and put the wood floor down. I can't wait to smack the floor with a sledgehammer.
Stinky dog is getting her teeth cleaned tomorrow. It will be nice to have a pet who's breath you can't smell in the dark. I may give her a kiss with some tongue when we get her back from the vet's. And it will be nice to not have Tiny's head smelling like Stinky's rank mouth after they're done playing.
I've been thinking about some weird stuff the last few days.
If I could do it over again, I don't think I'd touch my Grandma when she was at the funeral home. I'd never touched a dead person before and I've been having some way effed up dreams about how cold her hands were. And some major guilt over the fact that I didn't call her more before she died. Gee, of course I'd be feeling guilty about not calling her before she died. Not like I could call her afterwards.
Why is it that after hearing a girl name for the last little while I think to myself "Oooo, I'll have to put that on my baby girl name list!"? What list? I don't have a list.
Have you ever heard a song and instantly been reminded of an unpleasant time? Nothing like listening to the country station at 2 a.m. to have that happen.
I guess if you go to the drugstore at the aforementioned hour and spend 30 minutes in the facial cleanser/wrinkle smoother section a salesperson will eventually start tailing you to see if you are shoving products in your big pink purse. I'll get back with you on how well the at home face peel works. I smell disaster. Or maybe it's just the scent of old skin burning away to be replaced with shiny new stuff.
Tiny dog is wanting to play and Stinky just isn't having any of it. What a bossy little troll Tiny can be. Cute though. I take that back. The destructive little bitch is trying to eat a hole in the carpet. I guess she must find something to replace the wall. I'm gonna have to let her see me spray the carpet with some of the bitter apple stuff like I did on the wall to keep her away from it. I can just put my hand on that bottle of stuff now and she runs and hides. Sweety says I maced her. I think that's a rather violent way of phrasing it.
Stinky was running around barking her head off earlier. I spent 10 minutes telling her to calm down and shut up before I remembered that her way of letting me know that she's gotta poop is to bark her head off. Glad I remembered before she exploded.
LB started to cry this morning because his folder wasn't in his backpack. Sweety calmed him down by telling him it must still be at school. My first instinct was to swaddle him in a soft blanket and stick him in the trunk until it was time to leave. And then I was horrified that I'd even entertained such a thought. So I hid in the back room til they left. Used to, that kind of thought wouldn't bother me. I must be getting soft in my old age.
I started my diet by eating oatmeal this morning. Just call me Goldilocks. I've GOT to lose some weight. I'm about 10 pounds away from my heaviest. Sweety was kind enough to stock up on SlimFast and tuna kits for me this weekend. Yum yum.
I'm off next Monday. I'll have a 3 day weekend. I think we're going to smash the tile out of the kitchen and put the wood floor down. I can't wait to smack the floor with a sledgehammer.
Stinky dog is getting her teeth cleaned tomorrow. It will be nice to have a pet who's breath you can't smell in the dark. I may give her a kiss with some tongue when we get her back from the vet's. And it will be nice to not have Tiny's head smelling like Stinky's rank mouth after they're done playing.
8/28/05
What A Day
Took the sprogs to see Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. What a show. I wish that had been on t.v. the one time I took acid. Maybe it would have made for a better trip.
We moved the computer from our bedroom to the toyroom. It's nice to have the extra space in our room. I've always grouched about how hot our room is and having the computer out of there has definitely made it cooler. I didn't realize how having it running in a small room for 20 hours a day could warm it up so much.
Now I'll have to get a laptop since I won't be able to hide in the bedroom on this computer and pretend to be sleeping while I blog or obsessively check other peoples blogs.
I think I'll go hold Sweety's nose holes shut in a bit and watch him twitch.
We moved the computer from our bedroom to the toyroom. It's nice to have the extra space in our room. I've always grouched about how hot our room is and having the computer out of there has definitely made it cooler. I didn't realize how having it running in a small room for 20 hours a day could warm it up so much.
Now I'll have to get a laptop since I won't be able to hide in the bedroom on this computer and pretend to be sleeping while I blog or obsessively check other peoples blogs.
I think I'll go hold Sweety's nose holes shut in a bit and watch him twitch.
8/26/05
Cheery
Last night was just GREAT in customer service land. Effing awesome opossum. I love it when someone tells me that I have a bad attitude and they want me to transfer them to someone else. Then I love telling them no can do. They must call back for another try in the customer service representative lottery. I also find it interesting how I can be having a conversation with someone and as soon as I say something they don't like they tell me I'm talking too low or mumbling. I practically scream into the phone and I enunciate syllables very carefully cause the sooner you understand what I'm saying, the sooner you are off my phone. I know I'm feeling normal because instead of getting pissed off when people squawked at me last night, I kept getting the giggles. Much better than retreating to the bathroom to cry and place voodoo hexes on people. I can't wait for tonight!
I can't believe I signed up for stinking overtime. Agh. And I'm not even getting paid OT since I missed hours during this pay period.
I got gypped at the pharmacy this morning. They had pantyhose on sale; buy one and get one for a penny. But they charged me for both of them. I guess it's my fault for not catching it and I'm tempted to go back for a refund but I'm trying to decide if it's worth fooling with for five dollars.
Wow. I am out of gas.
I can't believe I signed up for stinking overtime. Agh. And I'm not even getting paid OT since I missed hours during this pay period.
I got gypped at the pharmacy this morning. They had pantyhose on sale; buy one and get one for a penny. But they charged me for both of them. I guess it's my fault for not catching it and I'm tempted to go back for a refund but I'm trying to decide if it's worth fooling with for five dollars.
Wow. I am out of gas.
8/25/05
My Weekend Is Over. Rats.
Frito scoops are the perfect way to get coleslaw to your mouth. An edible spoon. I love it. No wonder my body is out of whack. That and diet soda probably isn't the best breakfast. But I needed to get the rest of the coleslaw outta here so I wouldn't eat it later.
I'm working overtime today. I don't know what the hell I was thinking. I'll go in at 2 p.m. and get off at 2 a.m. Two extra hours, woo hoo! And I'm doing it again tomorrow. And next Wednesday I'm going in that morning for 4 hours. The reason I'm doing it is to try and offset some of the hours I missed earlier in the month. I would rather rub my eye with a cheese grater than be at work any extra time. But I'll go to give the illusion of being a team player.
We have to get some trees cut down to make way for William (the new pool). The tree guy should be here soon. Hopefully, once I put my earplugs in the chainsaws will just be white noise. I just hope Tiny dog doesn't go bonkers and start yapping in my ear.
Sweety's cold sore is finally totally gone. So I got a kiss last night! Yay! I'd almost forgotten what that was like. I guess if I was truly committed to him I'd have kissed him while his lip was all gross and then we could share the disease.
Sweety works for a place that sells food. And it is considered treason if I buy any brand other than theirs. Well, the other day I did the unthinkable and purchased from a competitor. I went to the store and they didn't have the stuff I like from Sweety's company so I bought someone else's. I thought Sweety was going to beat me to death with the kitchen tongs when we were unloading groceries and he saw me stick someone else's stuff in the icebox. Mental note to self: If I buy someone else's product ever again, hide it in the icebox. Check.
BB has lost a total of 8 teeth in the last week and a half. All side molars. LB has really gotten bent out of shape with all the dough BB is raking in from the tooth fairy.
I guess I'll go snug up with the pooches for a nap before work.
I'm working overtime today. I don't know what the hell I was thinking. I'll go in at 2 p.m. and get off at 2 a.m. Two extra hours, woo hoo! And I'm doing it again tomorrow. And next Wednesday I'm going in that morning for 4 hours. The reason I'm doing it is to try and offset some of the hours I missed earlier in the month. I would rather rub my eye with a cheese grater than be at work any extra time. But I'll go to give the illusion of being a team player.
We have to get some trees cut down to make way for William (the new pool). The tree guy should be here soon. Hopefully, once I put my earplugs in the chainsaws will just be white noise. I just hope Tiny dog doesn't go bonkers and start yapping in my ear.
Sweety's cold sore is finally totally gone. So I got a kiss last night! Yay! I'd almost forgotten what that was like. I guess if I was truly committed to him I'd have kissed him while his lip was all gross and then we could share the disease.
Sweety works for a place that sells food. And it is considered treason if I buy any brand other than theirs. Well, the other day I did the unthinkable and purchased from a competitor. I went to the store and they didn't have the stuff I like from Sweety's company so I bought someone else's. I thought Sweety was going to beat me to death with the kitchen tongs when we were unloading groceries and he saw me stick someone else's stuff in the icebox. Mental note to self: If I buy someone else's product ever again, hide it in the icebox. Check.
BB has lost a total of 8 teeth in the last week and a half. All side molars. LB has really gotten bent out of shape with all the dough BB is raking in from the tooth fairy.
I guess I'll go snug up with the pooches for a nap before work.
8/24/05
Things To Cringe At
Last night I showed Sweety this video of The Goddess Bunny. I saw it a couple of days ago and it has left unpleasant images with me ever since.
A little while ago he came shuffling into the room with this outfit on. He had been cleaning the boys' closets and he found this stuff that needs to be tossed out but he wanted to get a bit more use out of them first. It would have been better if he'd been wearing tap shoes. But I am sufficiently disturbed anyway.
And to cleanse your brain from the last two traumatic images, I will present Tiny dog modeling her new pink studded collar. There are only 3 studs on it but just wearing it makes her feel mean.
A little while ago he came shuffling into the room with this outfit on. He had been cleaning the boys' closets and he found this stuff that needs to be tossed out but he wanted to get a bit more use out of them first. It would have been better if he'd been wearing tap shoes. But I am sufficiently disturbed anyway.
And to cleanse your brain from the last two traumatic images, I will present Tiny dog modeling her new pink studded collar. There are only 3 studs on it but just wearing it makes her feel mean.
Success!
A big "Thank you!" to Bekah for suggesting some of this (Grannick's Bitter Apple Spray) to spray on the wall to keep Tiny dog away from it. I squirted a little of it in her mouth and then let her watch me hose down the wall with it. Seconds after that, chaos reigned.
Tiny dog was licking her lips a mile a minute so I put her in her cage for a drink of water. Instead of getting a drink she started having some sort of asthma attack. She was wheezing really hard (I could see her ribs sticking out while she tried to catch her breath) and I was beside myself because I thought she was suffering an allergic reaction and was getting ready to die a horribly violent death. But after a few minutes her breathing calmed down and she was okay.
So I took her over to the nibble place on the wall to see if she'd even be interested in giving it a chew and the answer was no. She put her feet on the ground and rubbed her toenails off trying to keep away from the wall. Last night she slept outside of her cage in the bathroom and there are no signs of her trying to tunnel out this morning. Success is mine!!!!
It just keeps getting better with EW. She called Sweety this morning to see if he'd trade her Friday night for his Saturday this week because she's babysitting on Saturday and she'd like the boys there to play with the kid. He told her no. She also said that she only left the boys home alone once and Sweety asked for it to never happen again. I'm glad that he spoke up about that.
Sweety read my post yesterday and he feels bad so he's going to try and get off from work in time to get the boys today. Now I feel bad. I told him I was just annoyed about it yesterday and I'm over it this morning. This is one of the reasons I'd rather he didn't read here.
Tiny dog was licking her lips a mile a minute so I put her in her cage for a drink of water. Instead of getting a drink she started having some sort of asthma attack. She was wheezing really hard (I could see her ribs sticking out while she tried to catch her breath) and I was beside myself because I thought she was suffering an allergic reaction and was getting ready to die a horribly violent death. But after a few minutes her breathing calmed down and she was okay.
So I took her over to the nibble place on the wall to see if she'd even be interested in giving it a chew and the answer was no. She put her feet on the ground and rubbed her toenails off trying to keep away from the wall. Last night she slept outside of her cage in the bathroom and there are no signs of her trying to tunnel out this morning. Success is mine!!!!
It just keeps getting better with EW. She called Sweety this morning to see if he'd trade her Friday night for his Saturday this week because she's babysitting on Saturday and she'd like the boys there to play with the kid. He told her no. She also said that she only left the boys home alone once and Sweety asked for it to never happen again. I'm glad that he spoke up about that.
Sweety read my post yesterday and he feels bad so he's going to try and get off from work in time to get the boys today. Now I feel bad. I told him I was just annoyed about it yesterday and I'm over it this morning. This is one of the reasons I'd rather he didn't read here.
8/23/05
Bitching About the EW
Yeah. I'm gonna grouch about the lawn sprinkler of life that my husband was married to before me some more.
I've been all excited for the last 2 days because I was to pick the boys up from school today and EW was to do it tomorrow. Which meant I was going to have Wednesday all to myself. I had big plans; Maybe the canines would get a trip out. (hee hee. i think i used the ; right!)
I even moved the lunch I was having with a friend on Wednesday to today so I wouldn't have to leave the house tomorrow if I didn't feel like it.
Sweety calls me just as I'm pulling up the restaurant for lunch and tells me that I don't need to get the kiddos after school today and will need to do it tomorrow instead. As my thoughts of Wednesday's freedom slithered away, I felt tears prick my beady eyes.
"Why? Has she got somewhere to fucking go?" was what came rolling out of my mouth. It turns out she is babysitting and tomorrow her charge needs to be picked up at 1:00 and that is also the time that the boys get out of school. So instead of asking the parent of the kid she's watching if before or after 1 would be okay she switched her day to pick them up.
There are a couple of reasons this whole thing chaps my ass:
1 - She threw a hissy fit when my niece was over here. Telling Sweety that the boys felt ignored and he wasn't being a good parent because there was another kid over here for him to pay attention to. Let's do some math here. LB and BB at her house plus their 3 year old brother plus her newborn baby plus at least one kid that she's babysitting equals 3 kids besides the boys. And she had the nerve to call over here peeved cause we had one stinking extra?
2 - Maybe I'm a selfish bitch but I was really looking forward to Wednesday alone. I'm off on Tuesday also but since I work on Monday night I'm usually pooped on Tuesday. So the idea of having a whole day in front of me with no obligations and being well rested on top of that is very appealing. I am praying that she doesn't want to change her Tuesday for Wednesday permanently. I might go sacrifice a cat or something to try and tip the odds in my favor.
3 - This one doesn't pertain to the picking up on Tuesdays or Wednesdays thing but I'm still pissed off about it. She's been leaving BB (who's 10) at home with LB (8) and the 3 year old brother when she goes to the grocery store. What in the name of all that is good and right does this bint think about? BB's a good kid but he is too young to be in charge of an 8 and 3 year old.
4 - And here's one more thing that's bugging me. She's talking about how she doesn't have money for clothes and gas but she can afford to pay to lay in a tanning bed and keep her hair blonde? We only know she tans cause BB called her yesterday to let her know he had just pulled out three (yes 3!) of his teeth and his grandma told him she went to the tanning salon. Don't effing poor-mouth if you can keep up with personal extra maintenance.
I think she's making sure to stay as appealing as her tree stump self can to better her chances of finding a new baby daddy.
I am so tempted to call CPS when she has a house full of kids and just watch shit blow up. Here I think the ratio of caregivers is 1 to 5. And you have to be certified by the state. I'm not feeling evil enough for that yet but give me a few more months.
Okay. I'm done ranting. I'm going to go and round up the troops and get ready to read them some more of The Magician's Nephew before bed. We're going to read that and the next book in the series before the Chronicles of Narnia movie comes out. It's a pretty good book so far. I can't believe that I hadn't read it til now.
I've been all excited for the last 2 days because I was to pick the boys up from school today and EW was to do it tomorrow. Which meant I was going to have Wednesday all to myself. I had big plans; Maybe the canines would get a trip out. (hee hee. i think i used the ; right!)
I even moved the lunch I was having with a friend on Wednesday to today so I wouldn't have to leave the house tomorrow if I didn't feel like it.
Sweety calls me just as I'm pulling up the restaurant for lunch and tells me that I don't need to get the kiddos after school today and will need to do it tomorrow instead. As my thoughts of Wednesday's freedom slithered away, I felt tears prick my beady eyes.
"Why? Has she got somewhere to fucking go?" was what came rolling out of my mouth. It turns out she is babysitting and tomorrow her charge needs to be picked up at 1:00 and that is also the time that the boys get out of school. So instead of asking the parent of the kid she's watching if before or after 1 would be okay she switched her day to pick them up.
There are a couple of reasons this whole thing chaps my ass:
1 - She threw a hissy fit when my niece was over here. Telling Sweety that the boys felt ignored and he wasn't being a good parent because there was another kid over here for him to pay attention to. Let's do some math here. LB and BB at her house plus their 3 year old brother plus her newborn baby plus at least one kid that she's babysitting equals 3 kids besides the boys. And she had the nerve to call over here peeved cause we had one stinking extra?
2 - Maybe I'm a selfish bitch but I was really looking forward to Wednesday alone. I'm off on Tuesday also but since I work on Monday night I'm usually pooped on Tuesday. So the idea of having a whole day in front of me with no obligations and being well rested on top of that is very appealing. I am praying that she doesn't want to change her Tuesday for Wednesday permanently. I might go sacrifice a cat or something to try and tip the odds in my favor.
3 - This one doesn't pertain to the picking up on Tuesdays or Wednesdays thing but I'm still pissed off about it. She's been leaving BB (who's 10) at home with LB (8) and the 3 year old brother when she goes to the grocery store. What in the name of all that is good and right does this bint think about? BB's a good kid but he is too young to be in charge of an 8 and 3 year old.
4 - And here's one more thing that's bugging me. She's talking about how she doesn't have money for clothes and gas but she can afford to pay to lay in a tanning bed and keep her hair blonde? We only know she tans cause BB called her yesterday to let her know he had just pulled out three (yes 3!) of his teeth and his grandma told him she went to the tanning salon. Don't effing poor-mouth if you can keep up with personal extra maintenance.
I think she's making sure to stay as appealing as her tree stump self can to better her chances of finding a new baby daddy.
I am so tempted to call CPS when she has a house full of kids and just watch shit blow up. Here I think the ratio of caregivers is 1 to 5. And you have to be certified by the state. I'm not feeling evil enough for that yet but give me a few more months.
Okay. I'm done ranting. I'm going to go and round up the troops and get ready to read them some more of The Magician's Nephew before bed. We're going to read that and the next book in the series before the Chronicles of Narnia movie comes out. It's a pretty good book so far. I can't believe that I hadn't read it til now.
8/22/05
Feeling "Normal"
It's nice to not feel like a lunatic all the time. Or at least not be all tired and sweaty. When I went to the pharmacy to get my new mental health pill they told me they didn't have any. So I'm just going to keep taking what I have been. I think my most recent nuttiness was coming from the blood pressure being out of control and I'm feeling 100 percent better than I was a week ago.
We went out to eat with some friends on Saturday night. I had suggested dinner with Sweety's sister and husband and somehow it turned into dinner for ten. Freaking ten people! When I found that out I almost fainted. But I lived. Maybe socialization isn't all bad. Not that I'll be making a habit of it or anything though.
Sweety patched the hole that Tiny dog gnawed in the wall. She was in the bathroom while I was showering and when I came out I got to view her newest handiwork. She'd licked/nibbled on the spot until she could start shredding it again. It has been decided that she can never be uncaged in the bathroom again. I think she just likes the taste of drywall. I asked Sweety if he had a gold brick or something in the wall that she was sniffing out. Unfortunately not. I guess she just has weird tastebuds. I'm thinking of getting a birdcage to hang on the porch and putting her in it at night so I can't hear her cry.
I had my first giant Kit Kat bar last night. Those things are almost as good as Twinkies. PM dropped it on my desk because I'm not going to buy such chocolatey goodness on my own and I considered it a sign. Then to make up for eating a tasty treat my actual lunch turned out to be crap. Mental note to self: Do not buy a salad from a fast food place. Check. I was planning on a baked potato but missed my turn and got a salad from somewhere else instead. Effing gross. And they forgot to give me salad dressing. After I was done picking out all the brown lettuce and tomatoes there wasn't much left to eat.
I saw the cutest stinking baby in the universe this weekend. Our friends that we went out with have a couple of kids and they brought them over here for the neighbor girl to babysit and I got to witness their adorable walking infant. He's just a little over a year old and I was getting such a kick out of watching him toddle around. He had on little crew socks with gray toes. He looked just like a tiny old man. I could almost make baby soup out of him. Sweety saw me oohing and ahhing over him and remarked that maybe it was time to get me another dog. Eh, I don't think so. I can't get the newest one to not bawl all the time or stop eating the walls.
Anne Arkham has the most interesting post up - Sundays at the Louvre. All of her posts are good reads but for some reason I really liked this one. And she knows how to use semicolons too. That's a bit of punctuation that I haven't mastered yet. I almost bought a book the other day to help me with my quest for better punctuation. But I thought it was silly to get a book to help me figure out when to use semicolons in my blog. I may go back for it.
I am officially sleepy again. Night.
We went out to eat with some friends on Saturday night. I had suggested dinner with Sweety's sister and husband and somehow it turned into dinner for ten. Freaking ten people! When I found that out I almost fainted. But I lived. Maybe socialization isn't all bad. Not that I'll be making a habit of it or anything though.
Sweety patched the hole that Tiny dog gnawed in the wall. She was in the bathroom while I was showering and when I came out I got to view her newest handiwork. She'd licked/nibbled on the spot until she could start shredding it again. It has been decided that she can never be uncaged in the bathroom again. I think she just likes the taste of drywall. I asked Sweety if he had a gold brick or something in the wall that she was sniffing out. Unfortunately not. I guess she just has weird tastebuds. I'm thinking of getting a birdcage to hang on the porch and putting her in it at night so I can't hear her cry.
I had my first giant Kit Kat bar last night. Those things are almost as good as Twinkies. PM dropped it on my desk because I'm not going to buy such chocolatey goodness on my own and I considered it a sign. Then to make up for eating a tasty treat my actual lunch turned out to be crap. Mental note to self: Do not buy a salad from a fast food place. Check. I was planning on a baked potato but missed my turn and got a salad from somewhere else instead. Effing gross. And they forgot to give me salad dressing. After I was done picking out all the brown lettuce and tomatoes there wasn't much left to eat.
I saw the cutest stinking baby in the universe this weekend. Our friends that we went out with have a couple of kids and they brought them over here for the neighbor girl to babysit and I got to witness their adorable walking infant. He's just a little over a year old and I was getting such a kick out of watching him toddle around. He had on little crew socks with gray toes. He looked just like a tiny old man. I could almost make baby soup out of him. Sweety saw me oohing and ahhing over him and remarked that maybe it was time to get me another dog. Eh, I don't think so. I can't get the newest one to not bawl all the time or stop eating the walls.
Anne Arkham has the most interesting post up - Sundays at the Louvre. All of her posts are good reads but for some reason I really liked this one. And she knows how to use semicolons too. That's a bit of punctuation that I haven't mastered yet. I almost bought a book the other day to help me with my quest for better punctuation. But I thought it was silly to get a book to help me figure out when to use semicolons in my blog. I may go back for it.
I am officially sleepy again. Night.
8/19/05
Where Are You Trying To Go, Tiny Dog?
Doesn't she look sorry? How could I possibly be angry with such a contrite looking little doggy? When I opened the door she knew she was in trouble. That is a freaking HOLE that she is trying to dig in the bathroom wall. I don't know if she's trying to tunnel out or what. I kept hearing this odd sound last night and I thought it was Stinky trying to get situated before sleep or gargoyles on the roof. Finally I went into the bathroom and this is what greeted me. Tiny even had drywall on her face. It was like catching a kid in the cooky jar. She slept in her cage last night.
I'm kind enough to buy her neato toys like this:
And I get repaid with destruction to my personal property. I may have to reevaluate my relationship with Oy.
Last night I learned that my Mom started having hot flashes when she was 35. That is only 6 years away. I'd thought I might possibly bear a child around that time. Just a teensy possibility. I guess if all my eggs dry up before I get around to it then it's a sign. I told a friend last night that I can't believe how close 35 seems and how far away 25 was. If it comes down to it I can always push the dogs around in a baby buggy.
8/18/05
Metamorphosis
I am quickly turning into a middle aged, round, high blood pressure having, Korean mother. I can watch myself in the mirror and see my body turning into my Mom's. All I need now is a perm and some reading glasses.
I didn't go to work today. I couldn't stop crying in the parking lot so I went to my doctor's instead. There it was noted that my blood pressure was at 170/110 which is high, I guess. It's been above normal every time I've had it taken but this is the highest ever. And I've gained 7 pounds since March. So I've been given strict instructions to cut back on the caffeine and never eat pork again and to start taking some type of medication for the bp. I go back in a week to see if it's going down. I am also getting to have some neat little round of tests done to see if my kidneys are damaged because the increase in blood pressure was pretty high for such a short amount of time. Goody goody. I am reaping the benefits of abusing my body for the last 15 years. Too bad Sweety doesn't have more life insurance on me.
My doctor also upped the Paxil while I was there. I know it freaks Sweety out for me to take medication but for about the last week I have felt all squirrelly on the inside like I did before I started taking anything. It just all came to a head today. When the doc told me he was upping it I questioned whether or not that was a lot of medicine. He noted my chewed to the bloody nub fingers and my twitching and the high bp and told me that if anyone needed something to calm them down, it was me.
I just got off the phone with my Mom. It was nice to talk to her. Yesterday was her birthday and she got my present today. I sent her a ceramic travel coffee mug. She seemed pleased. She's a CNA and has been having a problem finding the kind of pants for her nursing uniforms that she likes so I'm gonna try and track down some of those for her. I shared some odd little physical things that have been happening to me that I didn't tell my doctor about and she thinks it's a good thing I went to the doctor today cause I may have been headed to Stroke or Heart Attack City. My Mom's always had high blood pressure and both of my grandfather's had strokes. Mom's Dad had his while he was fairly young I think.
Tiny dog witnessed me puking my guts out today. She has always been very interested in mouths. I think because she sees food go in them; she figures there must be a way out for that food or she must be able to find a way in to it. When I was hurling I felt her little nose on my leg and thought that she was there to comfort me. Was I mistaken. She was more interested in the stuff flying out of my mouth and trying to find the best way to position herself so she could maybe catch some. Her suspicions of the food coming out of that hole have been confirmed. I expect her to try and eat my head the next time I'm asleep. I'm glad her teeth are small.
The roaring headache that I've had for about the last 12 hours is finally subsiding. I think the weather here draws my sinuses out through my eye sockets.
I didn't go to work today. I couldn't stop crying in the parking lot so I went to my doctor's instead. There it was noted that my blood pressure was at 170/110 which is high, I guess. It's been above normal every time I've had it taken but this is the highest ever. And I've gained 7 pounds since March. So I've been given strict instructions to cut back on the caffeine and never eat pork again and to start taking some type of medication for the bp. I go back in a week to see if it's going down. I am also getting to have some neat little round of tests done to see if my kidneys are damaged because the increase in blood pressure was pretty high for such a short amount of time. Goody goody. I am reaping the benefits of abusing my body for the last 15 years. Too bad Sweety doesn't have more life insurance on me.
My doctor also upped the Paxil while I was there. I know it freaks Sweety out for me to take medication but for about the last week I have felt all squirrelly on the inside like I did before I started taking anything. It just all came to a head today. When the doc told me he was upping it I questioned whether or not that was a lot of medicine. He noted my chewed to the bloody nub fingers and my twitching and the high bp and told me that if anyone needed something to calm them down, it was me.
I just got off the phone with my Mom. It was nice to talk to her. Yesterday was her birthday and she got my present today. I sent her a ceramic travel coffee mug. She seemed pleased. She's a CNA and has been having a problem finding the kind of pants for her nursing uniforms that she likes so I'm gonna try and track down some of those for her. I shared some odd little physical things that have been happening to me that I didn't tell my doctor about and she thinks it's a good thing I went to the doctor today cause I may have been headed to Stroke or Heart Attack City. My Mom's always had high blood pressure and both of my grandfather's had strokes. Mom's Dad had his while he was fairly young I think.
Tiny dog witnessed me puking my guts out today. She has always been very interested in mouths. I think because she sees food go in them; she figures there must be a way out for that food or she must be able to find a way in to it. When I was hurling I felt her little nose on my leg and thought that she was there to comfort me. Was I mistaken. She was more interested in the stuff flying out of my mouth and trying to find the best way to position herself so she could maybe catch some. Her suspicions of the food coming out of that hole have been confirmed. I expect her to try and eat my head the next time I'm asleep. I'm glad her teeth are small.
The roaring headache that I've had for about the last 12 hours is finally subsiding. I think the weather here draws my sinuses out through my eye sockets.
Crybaby
I don't know what the hell is up with me but I haven't stopped bawling since I woke up. Sheesh. It's been awhile since this has happened. I haven't done diddley in the last 2 days that I've been off. Actually, I've been off almost 3 days cause I came home early on Monday. Just been hiding in the bed or online. I wish the big rock that's hurtling towards me would either get here or this feeling of overwhelming dread would go play with someone else.
I'm going to try and find my happy face before I go to my godforsaken job.
I'm going to try and find my happy face before I go to my godforsaken job.
blah blah blah
I am so pissed off at that Jennifer chick on Big Brother 6. We record the show on Thursday and watch it on Saturday. So in the span of a couple of nights of t.v. watching I got to see that all my clicking to get Kaysar back on BB6 worked (my pointy finger is still numb) and that he was stabbed in the back and will be voted right back off. I'm going to find out where she lives and go put sand in her gas tank.
We went and picked out all the pool stuff yesterday. I'm pretty excited about it now. The inside of it is going to be pebbly so the water will look kind of dark. Sweety wanted a blinding white for the inside because he said it looks "crisp and clean and inviting". The white I saw kinda reminded me of a freshly scrubbed toilet. I told him I thought the darker stuff looked "dark and cool and soothing. it said come slip into my depths and drown from the relaxation". That is the feeling that I'm going for.
The EW is still tapdancing on my nerves. Silly shit. I'm sure once she gets back in the school routine that she'll quiet back down.
With the new box that we had to plug in to hook up the wireless thing there's not enough power outlets now. Not that I really NEED to shred something and print something and download pictures off my camera at the same time but the option would be nice.
Yesterday I killed about an hour and a half inside the bookstore and it was lovely. I kept picking books up and toting them around. Then I'd get some early buyer's regret and put them back on the shelf. I got the Cerulean Sins. The next book for me in the Anita Blake series. I haven't started reading it yet cause I know I won't put it down and I'm not ready to stare at something for so long.
There are a couple of blogs I read that aren't on my blogroll. I read them because they are blogs that I stumbled upon and said to myself "is this person for fucking real?". There's one where this lady is all bent outta shape because someone didn't allow her to become a member or whatever to comment on their blog. I'm pretty sure if someone kept me from posting on their blog that the last thing I would do is come back to my blog and rant about it in giant psychotic looking font. But I suppose our blogs are to do with as we please.
I better go dig up tiny dog so she can nap with me. I threw out my freaking back the other day hefting stinky up in the bed with me. She can sleep on the floor for a few days. I need to build some kind of something to lift her onto the bed. Maybe it could double as a hanger for a sex swing.
We went and picked out all the pool stuff yesterday. I'm pretty excited about it now. The inside of it is going to be pebbly so the water will look kind of dark. Sweety wanted a blinding white for the inside because he said it looks "crisp and clean and inviting". The white I saw kinda reminded me of a freshly scrubbed toilet. I told him I thought the darker stuff looked "dark and cool and soothing. it said come slip into my depths and drown from the relaxation". That is the feeling that I'm going for.
The EW is still tapdancing on my nerves. Silly shit. I'm sure once she gets back in the school routine that she'll quiet back down.
With the new box that we had to plug in to hook up the wireless thing there's not enough power outlets now. Not that I really NEED to shred something and print something and download pictures off my camera at the same time but the option would be nice.
Yesterday I killed about an hour and a half inside the bookstore and it was lovely. I kept picking books up and toting them around. Then I'd get some early buyer's regret and put them back on the shelf. I got the Cerulean Sins. The next book for me in the Anita Blake series. I haven't started reading it yet cause I know I won't put it down and I'm not ready to stare at something for so long.
There are a couple of blogs I read that aren't on my blogroll. I read them because they are blogs that I stumbled upon and said to myself "is this person for fucking real?". There's one where this lady is all bent outta shape because someone didn't allow her to become a member or whatever to comment on their blog. I'm pretty sure if someone kept me from posting on their blog that the last thing I would do is come back to my blog and rant about it in giant psychotic looking font. But I suppose our blogs are to do with as we please.
I better go dig up tiny dog so she can nap with me. I threw out my freaking back the other day hefting stinky up in the bed with me. She can sleep on the floor for a few days. I need to build some kind of something to lift her onto the bed. Maybe it could double as a hanger for a sex swing.
8/17/05
We Are Some WIRELESS Fools!
After 4 days of dinking with the computer we have managed to get all the wireless crap hooked up to it and it works. Weee-haaaa! I am so pleased.
This means that I can take Raoul into the kitchen and type away to my little heart's content. If I wanted to lug him in there. I am on the market for a laptop. I always said that I didn't want one but what's the point of having the capability to just flip open my laptop anywhere in the house if I don't have one? I already have the laptop's name picked out: Sasha. That way it can be a boy or a girl. An androgynous laptop.
And while we were poking around inside the computer we found one of stinky dog's puppies. It seems that all of the dog hair in the house had gathered by the motherboard and was pulling intelligence off the internet. Any day now it would have slithered out of the computer and killed us all. I will now make it a semi-annual ritual to dust inside the computer.
This means that I can take Raoul into the kitchen and type away to my little heart's content. If I wanted to lug him in there. I am on the market for a laptop. I always said that I didn't want one but what's the point of having the capability to just flip open my laptop anywhere in the house if I don't have one? I already have the laptop's name picked out: Sasha. That way it can be a boy or a girl. An androgynous laptop.
And while we were poking around inside the computer we found one of stinky dog's puppies. It seems that all of the dog hair in the house had gathered by the motherboard and was pulling intelligence off the internet. Any day now it would have slithered out of the computer and killed us all. I will now make it a semi-annual ritual to dust inside the computer.
My Cat Story
Zube Girl's post where she mentioned wanting a cat and Zube Boy forbidding it brought a little memory rushing back to me. And I thought I'd share it with ya'll.
About 10 years ago, while I was still with the exhusband (EH henceforth) the only thing I wanted for my birthday was a cat. And EH hated cats. His whole family thinks they are evil and come straight from hell. But it is the only thing I tell him that I want so finally he tells me that for my birthday I have his permission to get a cat. Hallelujah! Birdies sang and Jesus wept because we were all so overjoyed to be getting a kitty.
I spend the next couple of weeks thinking of what I'm going to name my kitten and imagining how cute she will be. Then EH does me a "favor" and goes to the animal shelter and brings a cat home. The ugliest cat in world, I shit you not. I cried when I saw her. She was a fat manx cat (no tail, just a little tab of a tail that would flip down and cover her anus) and was black and orange. Kinda the color of some pit bulls that I've seen. Not the tiny, cute, loving kitten I'd been dreaming of. And she was unfriendly as all get out.
Of course, I wanted to take her back. But EH said that if I took her back that I was wasting my chance for a cat. It was her or nothing. So I named the ugly thing Chloe and we grew on one another until she became the best and most beautiful cat in the world and she followed me all over the house. I adored her.
After EH realized that I was keeping the cat he confessed that he really didn't want a cat in the house so he picked out the ugliest cat hoping that I'd take it back. Fucker. No wonder we are divorced.
Now I'll get to the sad part.
It's about 2 years later and Chloe has been acting a tad off. Running away if I try to pet her and zooming around the house like someone is chasing her. I decide that she is going crazy and needs to go to the vet's. But first she needs a bath. Cause I can't take a dirty cat to the doctor.
I'm giving her the bath and she's all pissy and suddenly she gets all limp. I say "Who's the boss now you little bitch? Heh. You'll take this bath and like it, dammit." And I continue to soap her up and when I let go of her to rinse her she just slips underwater. I have just bathed a dead or dying cat. I yank her out of the water and give her CPR to the best of my ability but it didn't work. Cats stiffen pretty quickly after death so it was hard to do the chest compression thing.
When I see that she is truly dead I have a little bit of temporary insanity. I knew I needed to bury her but since she hated being bathed I didn't want to bury her wet. So I blew her dry with my hairdryer. I stopped when I saw sparks. I figured worse than drowning her would be scorching her corpse. Then I double bagged her in some new garbage bags.
I pick my burying spot and learn that we have no shovel. I have to go to wallyworld for a shovel. I'd been cleaning the house all day and I was wearing one of those big nightshirts with a bear on the front saying something like 'give me my coffee' and my hair was up in a broke ponytail. I looked like a nut on the drive to the store.
I had Chloe (in her bags) in the front seat with me because part of me was afraid that maybe she wasn't dead. Maybe she'd just had a stroke and was suffering some temporary paralysis. I didn't want her to come to and then smother in the plastic. I drove with my hand on her so I could tell if she twitched then I could yank the plastic off her.
By the time I run into the store and toss the shovel on the counter it's a little after 9 p.m. The clerk gives me and then the clock a weird look and asks me if I plan on doing some serious digging. I crank up with my incoherent crying and babbling about my dead cat in the car and no shovel and he pushes me on out the door.
When we get home it's too dark to bury her where I wanted and I didn't have a flashlight so I just turned on the porch light and dug a hole as far out as I could see. Which was about 5 feet from the front door. There were lots of tree roots so it took about 2.5 hours to dig a decent grave.
When EH gets home that night and asks about Chloe I tell him he got what he wanted and to look out the front door. It took him about 3 seconds to see the burial site since I'd covered it with some rocks and flowers. Then he's pissy because I buried her so close to the house.
I've never gotten another cat. She was such a great one that she can't be matched.
About 10 years ago, while I was still with the exhusband (EH henceforth) the only thing I wanted for my birthday was a cat. And EH hated cats. His whole family thinks they are evil and come straight from hell. But it is the only thing I tell him that I want so finally he tells me that for my birthday I have his permission to get a cat. Hallelujah! Birdies sang and Jesus wept because we were all so overjoyed to be getting a kitty.
I spend the next couple of weeks thinking of what I'm going to name my kitten and imagining how cute she will be. Then EH does me a "favor" and goes to the animal shelter and brings a cat home. The ugliest cat in world, I shit you not. I cried when I saw her. She was a fat manx cat (no tail, just a little tab of a tail that would flip down and cover her anus) and was black and orange. Kinda the color of some pit bulls that I've seen. Not the tiny, cute, loving kitten I'd been dreaming of. And she was unfriendly as all get out.
Of course, I wanted to take her back. But EH said that if I took her back that I was wasting my chance for a cat. It was her or nothing. So I named the ugly thing Chloe and we grew on one another until she became the best and most beautiful cat in the world and she followed me all over the house. I adored her.
After EH realized that I was keeping the cat he confessed that he really didn't want a cat in the house so he picked out the ugliest cat hoping that I'd take it back. Fucker. No wonder we are divorced.
Now I'll get to the sad part.
It's about 2 years later and Chloe has been acting a tad off. Running away if I try to pet her and zooming around the house like someone is chasing her. I decide that she is going crazy and needs to go to the vet's. But first she needs a bath. Cause I can't take a dirty cat to the doctor.
I'm giving her the bath and she's all pissy and suddenly she gets all limp. I say "Who's the boss now you little bitch? Heh. You'll take this bath and like it, dammit." And I continue to soap her up and when I let go of her to rinse her she just slips underwater. I have just bathed a dead or dying cat. I yank her out of the water and give her CPR to the best of my ability but it didn't work. Cats stiffen pretty quickly after death so it was hard to do the chest compression thing.
When I see that she is truly dead I have a little bit of temporary insanity. I knew I needed to bury her but since she hated being bathed I didn't want to bury her wet. So I blew her dry with my hairdryer. I stopped when I saw sparks. I figured worse than drowning her would be scorching her corpse. Then I double bagged her in some new garbage bags.
I pick my burying spot and learn that we have no shovel. I have to go to wallyworld for a shovel. I'd been cleaning the house all day and I was wearing one of those big nightshirts with a bear on the front saying something like 'give me my coffee' and my hair was up in a broke ponytail. I looked like a nut on the drive to the store.
I had Chloe (in her bags) in the front seat with me because part of me was afraid that maybe she wasn't dead. Maybe she'd just had a stroke and was suffering some temporary paralysis. I didn't want her to come to and then smother in the plastic. I drove with my hand on her so I could tell if she twitched then I could yank the plastic off her.
By the time I run into the store and toss the shovel on the counter it's a little after 9 p.m. The clerk gives me and then the clock a weird look and asks me if I plan on doing some serious digging. I crank up with my incoherent crying and babbling about my dead cat in the car and no shovel and he pushes me on out the door.
When we get home it's too dark to bury her where I wanted and I didn't have a flashlight so I just turned on the porch light and dug a hole as far out as I could see. Which was about 5 feet from the front door. There were lots of tree roots so it took about 2.5 hours to dig a decent grave.
When EH gets home that night and asks about Chloe I tell him he got what he wanted and to look out the front door. It took him about 3 seconds to see the burial site since I'd covered it with some rocks and flowers. Then he's pissy because I buried her so close to the house.
I've never gotten another cat. She was such a great one that she can't be matched.
8/16/05
Bad Mood Squished
Man, I thought I was going to eat a child just 3 short hours ago. I have soothed my inner beast with pizza and soda. All is well now.
And I've gotta give another big ol' "Thank You!" to SK for the Amazon.com gift certificate she sent me as a surprise for guest hosting her blog. I used it to get 2 books that I've been wanting but never seem to be able to find when I'm at the bookstore. Magical Thinking (the hardcover edition. yay!) and drumroll please... The Talisman - which is my favorite book in the world. And did I get just any copy? Nooooooo. A first edition. So it's not brand spanking new but it pleases me to no end. It made my thingy get all wet when I opened the box. Had to go change my panties.
In approximately an hour the kiddos will be in bed and I will get to snuggle with Sweety. He still has that fucking herpe on his bottom lip. This means that I haven't been getting kisses Any-freaking-where. Nothing like not being able to have something to make you want it even more.
And I've gotta give another big ol' "Thank You!" to SK for the Amazon.com gift certificate she sent me as a surprise for guest hosting her blog. I used it to get 2 books that I've been wanting but never seem to be able to find when I'm at the bookstore. Magical Thinking (the hardcover edition. yay!) and drumroll please... The Talisman - which is my favorite book in the world. And did I get just any copy? Nooooooo. A first edition. So it's not brand spanking new but it pleases me to no end. It made my thingy get all wet when I opened the box. Had to go change my panties.
In approximately an hour the kiddos will be in bed and I will get to snuggle with Sweety. He still has that fucking herpe on his bottom lip. This means that I haven't been getting kisses Any-freaking-where. Nothing like not being able to have something to make you want it even more.
Tiny Cheese Grater Is Missing
I have a little tiny cheese grater that I use to rub my left eye with when I'm annoyed. And I really need that bitch today. Where the hell is she? Probably ran off with the kitchen tongs.
If you are a 5th grader and you want help with your homework, then dammit, let me help you. When I offer a "suggestion" (which is probably the answer, helllooo!) don't cut me off and tell me that word isn't right because you've already used it. I hate to be the bearer of bad news little son, but this means that your other answer is WRONG too. And then don't get all pissy because a bunch of your answers are wrong because you are in an all fired hurry to finish your homework so you can go kick your little brother's ass. And by the way, I can hear you kicking his ass.
Ah, fuck. I'm fixing to go get the broom and threaten my sprogs.
I am now back. Instead of having to resort to violence I told them if I heard another peep outta them, instead of having pizza for dinner they will have brussel sprouts cooked with butter and garlic. Which I love but they can't stand. LB said he'd puke if he had to eat that. I said I'd make him eat the puke. They are as quiet as church mice right now.
Bwwwwahaaahaaaha!
If you are a 5th grader and you want help with your homework, then dammit, let me help you. When I offer a "suggestion" (which is probably the answer, helllooo!) don't cut me off and tell me that word isn't right because you've already used it. I hate to be the bearer of bad news little son, but this means that your other answer is WRONG too. And then don't get all pissy because a bunch of your answers are wrong because you are in an all fired hurry to finish your homework so you can go kick your little brother's ass. And by the way, I can hear you kicking his ass.
Ah, fuck. I'm fixing to go get the broom and threaten my sprogs.
I am now back. Instead of having to resort to violence I told them if I heard another peep outta them, instead of having pizza for dinner they will have brussel sprouts cooked with butter and garlic. Which I love but they can't stand. LB said he'd puke if he had to eat that. I said I'd make him eat the puke. They are as quiet as church mice right now.
Bwwwwahaaahaaaha!
8/14/05
A Thorn In My Side
I really didn't realize what a pain in the ass it would be to get an exwife when I got a husband. Before I landed here in the Sunshine State the EW didn't have a lot to do with the boys. My thinking was "Whew. Won't have to deal with her too much." Ha ha on me. Once she found out about me is when (in her own words) she decided to 'be more of a mother figure'. Well phooey for me.
I must admit that the annoyances that she tosses our way have diminished greatly. For about the first 2 years she called Sweety regularly to bitch about something I was doing that she didn't like or to tell him that she was going to redo the divorce and get custody of the boys and child support. She also said she wanted to redo the divorce to get the house this time around. Huh? When was the last time you heard of someone redoing a divorce? She is not the sharpest tool in the shed.
We're down to the occasional annoyance now. EW's husband kicked the bucket from a brain tumor at the beginning of the year. He left behind and exwife with 2 daughters as well as EW and her spawn. EW took the boys to a party for one of their stepsisters (except the boys are not allowed to call them stepsisters. they are real sisters and god help me if someone refers to them otherwise) and she told the boys that their sisters mom was getting a divorce but they needed to keep it a secret from the girls because they hadn't been told yet. Why the fuck do you even tell something like that to an 8 and 10 year old and then tell them to keep quiet about it? Sweety is going to suggest to her that maybe it could be counterproductive in the future if the boys think it's a good idea to keep secrets from your family. Effing nimrod. When I passed the car that had been burnt to a crisp on Saturday morning I caught myself checking to see if it was hers.
EW has spoken of how Sweety and I just don't understand how hard her life is and how nice it must be to have 2 incomes in a sarcastic manner (this is before she was widowed). I'm sorry if you are an undereducated baby making machine and I'm not. No wait, I'm not sorry. Life is what you make of it. She had even grouched about how her and her husband never got to go on a vacation alone because if they didn't have LB and BB they had their other son with them and Sweety and I got to go away alone. Who's fucking fault is that? If you're having such a hard time handling 2 kids part time then perhaps you shouldn't boing out anymore? Just a suggestion.
She will probably find my blog someday and come and kill my dogs.
I am so glad that Sweety did not reproduce with his first wife. I don't think I could handle 2 EW's. And I am eternally grateful that he has boys instead of girls. I don't think that I could handle girls.
I must admit that the annoyances that she tosses our way have diminished greatly. For about the first 2 years she called Sweety regularly to bitch about something I was doing that she didn't like or to tell him that she was going to redo the divorce and get custody of the boys and child support. She also said she wanted to redo the divorce to get the house this time around. Huh? When was the last time you heard of someone redoing a divorce? She is not the sharpest tool in the shed.
We're down to the occasional annoyance now. EW's husband kicked the bucket from a brain tumor at the beginning of the year. He left behind and exwife with 2 daughters as well as EW and her spawn. EW took the boys to a party for one of their stepsisters (except the boys are not allowed to call them stepsisters. they are real sisters and god help me if someone refers to them otherwise) and she told the boys that their sisters mom was getting a divorce but they needed to keep it a secret from the girls because they hadn't been told yet. Why the fuck do you even tell something like that to an 8 and 10 year old and then tell them to keep quiet about it? Sweety is going to suggest to her that maybe it could be counterproductive in the future if the boys think it's a good idea to keep secrets from your family. Effing nimrod. When I passed the car that had been burnt to a crisp on Saturday morning I caught myself checking to see if it was hers.
EW has spoken of how Sweety and I just don't understand how hard her life is and how nice it must be to have 2 incomes in a sarcastic manner (this is before she was widowed). I'm sorry if you are an undereducated baby making machine and I'm not. No wait, I'm not sorry. Life is what you make of it. She had even grouched about how her and her husband never got to go on a vacation alone because if they didn't have LB and BB they had their other son with them and Sweety and I got to go away alone. Who's fucking fault is that? If you're having such a hard time handling 2 kids part time then perhaps you shouldn't boing out anymore? Just a suggestion.
She will probably find my blog someday and come and kill my dogs.
I am so glad that Sweety did not reproduce with his first wife. I don't think I could handle 2 EW's. And I am eternally grateful that he has boys instead of girls. I don't think that I could handle girls.
8/13/05
Sleepy Ramblings
I was stuck in traffic this morning due to a horrific car crash. I was zipping up the interstate when I realized there was a flaming car on the side of the road and traffic was stopping. I have never seen a car burning. Pretty big. I think it was a 2 car crash cause when they were shooing us through on the left was the burnt car and to the right all of the trees were knocked down and emergency workers were filing in and out of the opening like ants. Luckily I was close enough that when they needed to land the emergency helicopter I was parked where it needed to land. So I was told to move around the wreckage slowly. All together, I sat there not moving for about an hour. It surprised and appalled me at how many people were getting out of their cars to walk up and gawk at the wreck. There was one couple with a kid around 10 or so. What the hell are you doing out with a kid that age at 3 in the morning and on top of that why would you take him out of the car to go look at such? People are nosy sickos. I will admit that I peek at accidents when I drive by but I'm not going to turn off my effing car and walk up to the crash seen to have a look. I just sat in my car and read my book. I tried to call Sweety and make him amuse me but he was too sleepy.
When I got home I saw that tiny dog had really taken a liking to eating the wall. In the bathroom there's been a spot about the size of a quarter that she nibbled off when we were on vacation. I thought it was something she just did that one time. Yesterday she really started munching down on the wall and now there's a strip about 3 inches long where she's shredded through the wall plaster. I saw her going back after it so I put some of Sweety clear deodorant on it. That seems to be deterring her from nibbling it further.
I woke after 3 hours of sleep with the overwhelming urge to eat fruit. Must be my body's was of telling me that scurvy is imminent if I don't get some vitamin C. And all I could find was stinking fruit cups. I had one and may go scarf down another. We need to go grocery shopping.
Sweety's taking the boys shoe shopping today. That's one back to school ritual that I prefer to not partake in. Too time consuming and kids are so picky. They pretty much get to choose whatever kind of shoes they want. I know Sweety does this because he had to wear crappy shoes when he was a kid but after going to 3 different stores and looking at shoes that cost at least $50 I start to get a little edgy and grouchy. Things like "Holy shit. If I had the green light to get shoes like that when I was a kid I wouldn't have insisted on going to every store in the mall. Just pick a pair already." I almost had a nervous breakdown just following the shopping caravan a couple of years ago so I find other things to do when they shoe shop.
Tonight I promised to read them 2 more chapters in the Lemony Snickett book that we're working on. This means bedtime for them at 7:50 and a lot of paraphrasing of the chapters for me so I can have alone time with Sweety sooner.
I better get back in bed with tiny dog and get some sleep before the troops get home. So I can do the "good parent" thing.
When I got home I saw that tiny dog had really taken a liking to eating the wall. In the bathroom there's been a spot about the size of a quarter that she nibbled off when we were on vacation. I thought it was something she just did that one time. Yesterday she really started munching down on the wall and now there's a strip about 3 inches long where she's shredded through the wall plaster. I saw her going back after it so I put some of Sweety clear deodorant on it. That seems to be deterring her from nibbling it further.
I woke after 3 hours of sleep with the overwhelming urge to eat fruit. Must be my body's was of telling me that scurvy is imminent if I don't get some vitamin C. And all I could find was stinking fruit cups. I had one and may go scarf down another. We need to go grocery shopping.
Sweety's taking the boys shoe shopping today. That's one back to school ritual that I prefer to not partake in. Too time consuming and kids are so picky. They pretty much get to choose whatever kind of shoes they want. I know Sweety does this because he had to wear crappy shoes when he was a kid but after going to 3 different stores and looking at shoes that cost at least $50 I start to get a little edgy and grouchy. Things like "Holy shit. If I had the green light to get shoes like that when I was a kid I wouldn't have insisted on going to every store in the mall. Just pick a pair already." I almost had a nervous breakdown just following the shopping caravan a couple of years ago so I find other things to do when they shoe shop.
Tonight I promised to read them 2 more chapters in the Lemony Snickett book that we're working on. This means bedtime for them at 7:50 and a lot of paraphrasing of the chapters for me so I can have alone time with Sweety sooner.
I better get back in bed with tiny dog and get some sleep before the troops get home. So I can do the "good parent" thing.
8/12/05
Whoa. That Was A Surprise.
Any of ya'll remember Bad Girl and her blog "Diary of an Affair"? Well, I happened to still have the link to that on my AOL favs list and accidentally clicked on it this morning and instead of getting the message saying that the site was unavailable got a porn site.
Mental note to self: Even if I stop blogging keep my blog open so nobody else can have my little blog address. Check.
And with visions of sugarplums dancing in my head - I am off to bed.
Heh heh. I'm a poet.
Mental note to self: Even if I stop blogging keep my blog open so nobody else can have my little blog address. Check.
And with visions of sugarplums dancing in my head - I am off to bed.
Heh heh. I'm a poet.
8/11/05
Speciesm
If you haven't been there, you really need to go check out Eureka Blyth and see the horror that has unfolded with Bekah's animals. I must say - why can't we all just get along?
Poor Mr. Puffs.
Note the ear that was ripped off during an attack by the local dog gang.
Poor Mr. Puffs.Note the ear that was ripped off during an attack by the local dog gang.
Soothing Stinky Dog's Feelings
Last night Stinky was looking a little down and after much prodding on my part she started to share some of her feelings. It seems that she feels slighted because so many photos of Tiny dog get taken but not as many of her. She also doesn't like being called stinky dog. She would much prefer if I'd use her given name of Tasha. After explaining to her that "stinky dog" was really a term of endearment that meant "smart and wonderful" (she's not the brightest dog so she believes me) she's more okay with the nickname. And when I told her to pose for some photos she was beside herself with joy.
She asked to use the table as a prop because it is one of her favorite things. She knows if she stays under it long enough that food will eventually find it's way to the floor and her mouth.
In choosing this location for her next shot she was showing her dominant place in the household. This is where Sweety usually lays.
I asked her if she wanted to get any shirts made like tiny dog Oy has but she didn't. She thinks she's beautiful without any bling. I do agree.
Here's Sweety expressing his happiness at Tasha getting off of his couch.
And here's tiny dog ignoring us and recharging during Tasha's photo shoot.
She asked to use the table as a prop because it is one of her favorite things. She knows if she stays under it long enough that food will eventually find it's way to the floor and her mouth. In choosing this location for her next shot she was showing her dominant place in the household. This is where Sweety usually lays.I asked her if she wanted to get any shirts made like tiny dog Oy has but she didn't. She thinks she's beautiful without any bling. I do agree.
Here's Sweety expressing his happiness at Tasha getting off of his couch.
And here's tiny dog ignoring us and recharging during Tasha's photo shoot.
A Little Something From SK
This was over at SK's place! And I am such a moron that I thought #8 meant if she replied then I had to put the reply on my blog. After checking out Zube Girl's post this morning I realize that I'm supposed to put the meme over her to make available for others to play. Well shit. I stink at this sort of thing.
Any takers feel free to comment and I'll do my best.
1. Reply with your name and I'll respond with some random thought about you.
2. I'll tell you what song/movie reminds me of you.
3. I'll pick a flavor of jello to wrestle with you in.
4. I'll say something that only makes sense to you and me (I hope).
5. I'll tell you my first memory of you.
6. I'll tell you what animal you remind me of.
7. I'll ask you something that I've always wondered about you.
8. If I do this for you, you must post this on your journal.
Now I'm going to post some other things to bury this post.
Zube Girl
1. You seem like you have a bong collection. Maybe it's just your photo with the gigantic beer that makes me think that.
2. The "I'd like to buy the world a Coke" theme song. I dunno why. It just does.
3. Lime
4. The eagle flys at dawn. Okay, nevermind. I don't know you well enough for this one.
5. Reading your blog after SK referred you and thinking "Man. This chick is a nut. I like her. I wish she lived in Florida."
6. A ferret. From your writing you seem to be quick. And with quickness comes to ability to sneak into small spaces.
7. How did you and Zube boy meet? And acquire your pets? Maybe you posted this at some point but I've missed it in your archives.
8. Thank you Z-Girl!
Any takers feel free to comment and I'll do my best.
1. Reply with your name and I'll respond with some random thought about you.
2. I'll tell you what song/movie reminds me of you.
3. I'll pick a flavor of jello to wrestle with you in.
4. I'll say something that only makes sense to you and me (I hope).
5. I'll tell you my first memory of you.
6. I'll tell you what animal you remind me of.
7. I'll ask you something that I've always wondered about you.
8. If I do this for you, you must post this on your journal.
Now I'm going to post some other things to bury this post.
Zube Girl
1. You seem like you have a bong collection. Maybe it's just your photo with the gigantic beer that makes me think that.
2. The "I'd like to buy the world a Coke" theme song. I dunno why. It just does.
3. Lime
4. The eagle flys at dawn. Okay, nevermind. I don't know you well enough for this one.
5. Reading your blog after SK referred you and thinking "Man. This chick is a nut. I like her. I wish she lived in Florida."
6. A ferret. From your writing you seem to be quick. And with quickness comes to ability to sneak into small spaces.
7. How did you and Zube boy meet? And acquire your pets? Maybe you posted this at some point but I've missed it in your archives.
8. Thank you Z-Girl!
8/10/05
Karma
Stinky dog seems to have suffered no ill side effects from eating the leftover chinese chicken. However, I had some fast food chili about 2 hours ago and I feel like I need a good vomit. I will embrace this feeling and be glad that I'm having it and not Tasha.
Our house remortgage check came today. Woo hoo! We deposited it into my checking account instead of Sweety's cause it was made out to him and me in my maiden name and my checking account is in that name but my i.d. is not. Sweety wondered if this was part of my master plan to take him for all he's worth. I know that we were planning on using the money to fund a pool but a Nissan 350Z would be nice too. When the kids are bored, instead of sending them to the pool, I could tell them to go polish my wheels.
Three posts in one day. You can tell that I'm really putting off cleaning the house.
Our house remortgage check came today. Woo hoo! We deposited it into my checking account instead of Sweety's cause it was made out to him and me in my maiden name and my checking account is in that name but my i.d. is not. Sweety wondered if this was part of my master plan to take him for all he's worth. I know that we were planning on using the money to fund a pool but a Nissan 350Z would be nice too. When the kids are bored, instead of sending them to the pool, I could tell them to go polish my wheels.
Three posts in one day. You can tell that I'm really putting off cleaning the house.
Animal Cruelty
I am such a bad "mother".
Yesterday I took a leftover pan of chinese cashew chicken that I was gonna throw out and put it by our garage door and then opened it just a crack so the cat could get in and out. Our cat won't eat leftovers but the neighbor's cats will. So I put the whole pan out there in the hopes that the neighbor's mean-ass cats would gorge themselves on the chicken and puke their little kitty guts out and never come back to my garage again. Cause these cats are effing mean. They'll get in our garage and eat all our cat's food, pee on everything, tear up shoes and then be gone before you can get out there.
Fast forward to this afternoon...
Stinky dog Tasha and tiny dog Oy are tied up outside basking in the sun. I like to let 'em outside after they've been in bed with me all day so they can soak up some vitamin D. I open the garage door to take the trash out and by the time I'm out of the kitchen and into the garage Stinky has eaten half of the food that's been there all night and all hot day long. I suppose the aroma was overwhelming and called to her as soon as the garage door was cracked.
So my plan backfired. There were no neighbor cats skulking about waiting to gain access to the garage but now I've got a dog who will probably be shitting string cheese any minute.
And really. I'm not an animal abuser. If I was, I'd have left a bowl of anitfreeze out for the bully cats a long time ago.
Yesterday I took a leftover pan of chinese cashew chicken that I was gonna throw out and put it by our garage door and then opened it just a crack so the cat could get in and out. Our cat won't eat leftovers but the neighbor's cats will. So I put the whole pan out there in the hopes that the neighbor's mean-ass cats would gorge themselves on the chicken and puke their little kitty guts out and never come back to my garage again. Cause these cats are effing mean. They'll get in our garage and eat all our cat's food, pee on everything, tear up shoes and then be gone before you can get out there.
Fast forward to this afternoon...
Stinky dog Tasha and tiny dog Oy are tied up outside basking in the sun. I like to let 'em outside after they've been in bed with me all day so they can soak up some vitamin D. I open the garage door to take the trash out and by the time I'm out of the kitchen and into the garage Stinky has eaten half of the food that's been there all night and all hot day long. I suppose the aroma was overwhelming and called to her as soon as the garage door was cracked.
So my plan backfired. There were no neighbor cats skulking about waiting to gain access to the garage but now I've got a dog who will probably be shitting string cheese any minute.
And really. I'm not an animal abuser. If I was, I'd have left a bowl of anitfreeze out for the bully cats a long time ago.
Just Grouching
I'm putting off going to the post office. Our town has the world's suckiest one. Always a line out the door. My Mom sent me a lamp for my birthday and it was demolished during shipping but luckily she purchased insurance. It may be a good thing that the lamp was squashed cause I don't know where I would have put it. I collect dragons and this the lamp has a glittery dragon base. Interesting but it wasn't going to match my angels that sit on my side table very well. This saves me from having to move my stuff around.
Sweety saw EW at the school the other day and she told him that she's looking for a house in our school district. When I first moved down here she was about 20 miles away. Now she's about 5 miles up the road. And will have to get even closer to be in our school district. Fucking wonderful. There is a house about 3 doors down that is going to be up for rent next month. If she moves there it will be a sign for me to eat a lit firecracker.
Well crapola. I ought to go on the the post office and get it over with.
Sweety saw EW at the school the other day and she told him that she's looking for a house in our school district. When I first moved down here she was about 20 miles away. Now she's about 5 miles up the road. And will have to get even closer to be in our school district. Fucking wonderful. There is a house about 3 doors down that is going to be up for rent next month. If she moves there it will be a sign for me to eat a lit firecracker.
Well crapola. I ought to go on the the post office and get it over with.
8/9/05
Diseased Sweety
He has his very first cold sore. I've never had one and I've been giving him a wide margin so the molecules don't jump over on me. I feel sorry for him. It's right in the middle of his bottom lip and it just keeps growing. He got some Abreva stuff when we figured out what it was but it doesn't seem to be helping. Or maybe it is helping and the thing would be covering his face by now if he wasn't spackling that stuff on it.
Yesterday was when the check for the remortgaging of our house was to be delivered. And it seems that I didn't get out of bed for the delivery. I was asleep with my earplugs deep inside my head, surrounded by dog love and having some kind of dream where someone was banging on my bed. I woke enough to make sure both dogs were still with me (so i didn't have to worry the banging was someone telling me a dog had been ran over. though since they are never roaming free outside i don't know how that would've happened anyway.) and then went back to sleep. When Sweety got home he asked me if we'd gotten our delivery. Huh? What's he talking about? I didn't order anything. He sees my confusion and reminds me the check for the pool and my perky boobies was to be delivered. Doh! Crap! So I've spent all day so far sleeping lightly (without earplugs and with the bedroom door open) but nobody's come knocking. They'll probably come back by when I'm getting the sprogs from school.
Sweety's job required him to be about 2 hours Away today. Instead of getting home around 3:30 it'll be closer to 5:00. This means I will have my first dose of helping the children with their homework. I can't wait! I'm sharpening up my tiny cheese grater right now so it'll be all ready to rub over my eye in about 2 hours. And then I'll get a fluffy pink eyepatch so I'll match tiny dog's new shirt.
Yesterday was when the check for the remortgaging of our house was to be delivered. And it seems that I didn't get out of bed for the delivery. I was asleep with my earplugs deep inside my head, surrounded by dog love and having some kind of dream where someone was banging on my bed. I woke enough to make sure both dogs were still with me (so i didn't have to worry the banging was someone telling me a dog had been ran over. though since they are never roaming free outside i don't know how that would've happened anyway.) and then went back to sleep. When Sweety got home he asked me if we'd gotten our delivery. Huh? What's he talking about? I didn't order anything. He sees my confusion and reminds me the check for the pool and my perky boobies was to be delivered. Doh! Crap! So I've spent all day so far sleeping lightly (without earplugs and with the bedroom door open) but nobody's come knocking. They'll probably come back by when I'm getting the sprogs from school.
Sweety's job required him to be about 2 hours Away today. Instead of getting home around 3:30 it'll be closer to 5:00. This means I will have my first dose of helping the children with their homework. I can't wait! I'm sharpening up my tiny cheese grater right now so it'll be all ready to rub over my eye in about 2 hours. And then I'll get a fluffy pink eyepatch so I'll match tiny dog's new shirt.
My Own Muppet
I think she is quite twee looking in her new threads.
And just a little more tiny dog and I'll lay off her for awhile.
Here she is digging for treats in the trash.
And there she goes upon realizing that she's on Candid Camera.
I'll stop taking pictures of Oy for today. I think her retinas are fixing to burn out and I can hardly stand all the cuteness.
8/8/05
Nostrils of Fire
Have you ever been eating or drinking something and then choked on it so that some of the stuff came out of your nose? I just did that and I think I'm gonna die. PM from work sent me an article about Korean restaurants and it made me hungry. So I made myself a bowl of rice, sesame seeds, and mushrooms and spiced it up with some hot bean paste. When I'm eating I crunch down on something. That something is dirt because I forgot to wash my 'shrooms. I think "ew. i'm eating dirty mushrooms. wonder if there's any manure on them?" and I choke trying to decide if I should spit out my last bite or not. I have been blowing fiery bits of rice out of my nose. This shit is stinging. I tried to sniff a little water after it to maybe wash it out but that didn't work. My sinuses are burning but the injured nose hole is working very well now.
Last night at work was uneventful. PM was the only person who knew it was my birthday and he brought me a card. I like it like that. I really enjoyed everyone's "happy birthday's" on my blog but in person I'd just rather have the masses stay away.
And SK was kind enough to send me an Amazon certificate for hosting her blog while she was on her cruise. Maybe I can find a muzzle for tiny dog there. She mentioned that she hadn't expected me to post so much, maybe once or twice. Geez, I didn't realize that. I'd never guest hosted before so I thought it was my job to try and keep up with what she usually does. Next time, I'll be lazier :)
I'm gonna go try and blow some more rice out.
Last night at work was uneventful. PM was the only person who knew it was my birthday and he brought me a card. I like it like that. I really enjoyed everyone's "happy birthday's" on my blog but in person I'd just rather have the masses stay away.
And SK was kind enough to send me an Amazon certificate for hosting her blog while she was on her cruise. Maybe I can find a muzzle for tiny dog there. She mentioned that she hadn't expected me to post so much, maybe once or twice. Geez, I didn't realize that. I'd never guest hosted before so I thought it was my job to try and keep up with what she usually does. Next time, I'll be lazier :)
I'm gonna go try and blow some more rice out.
8/7/05
Happy Birthday To Me!
I don't feel any older. Good.
I woke this morning in a very loving mood so I let stinky and tiny come to bed with me after Sweety got up.
As you can see stinky dog is completely blissed out. And tiny dog was just going crazy because she'd never been in the bed with stinky dog. After they both got all snuggled in beside me I realized that the temperature of sleeping dogs is about 150 degrees.
And here's Oy being a little sneak and getting caught.
I would be so traumatized if my dog hung herself with my bra. I'm going to have to change where I put them.
I woke this morning in a very loving mood so I let stinky and tiny come to bed with me after Sweety got up.
As you can see stinky dog is completely blissed out. And tiny dog was just going crazy because she'd never been in the bed with stinky dog. After they both got all snuggled in beside me I realized that the temperature of sleeping dogs is about 150 degrees.
And here's Oy being a little sneak and getting caught.
I would be so traumatized if my dog hung herself with my bra. I'm going to have to change where I put them.
8/6/05
Reality T.V. Whore Is Begging For Help
If you have nothing better to do, please oh please, go here and get Kaysar voted back on Big Brother 6. My pointy finger is blistered from clicking the mouse button.
If you go vote, I'll send you a cookie.
If you go vote, I'll send you a cookie.
Just Grouching
We went to the school yesterday to meet the boys' teachers for next year. Earlier in the day EW called Sweety to make sure that he was picking them up from school on Monday and not me. Since it's the first day she feels a parent should pick them up. Hmm, when LB wanted to come here early (and she knew I was the only person here) from her house the other day she didn't have a problem in bringing them over. She is a fucktard. I have picked them up from their first day before. I guess she's just feeling extra motherly right now. She has not been on one fucking field trip but the first day of school is so special that I shouldn't pick them up? I loathe her. I hope she dies a horrible fiery death. Dumbass. I told Sweety if he'd let me get them on Monday that I'll give up whatever goods he wants in the bedroom. Is that prostituting myself? Nah, not if we're married.
You know the pencil test? Where you take a pencil and put it under your boobs and if the pencil doesn't fall then that means they are too saggy? Sweety was getting a canned drink out of the icebox yesterday and decided to give me the pencil test using a soda can. I failed. That fucking can didn't move once he got it tucked under my boobs. I gave him a nosebleed using my supersonic thoughtbeams. He will be sorry when I get them perked up and start going to the grocery store in a bikini top.
My computer had been running very slow and yesterday I couldn't even get to AOL. I managed to reinstall that and then clean up some other things on the computer. Hopefully it will keep on running.
The canines were bathed today. And they are both so exhausted from it that they're sleeping like rocks. I am tempted to wake them so they won't keep me awake tonight playing with each other.
We're supposed to go out to eat with another couple tonight or if they can't get a babysitter they are coming over here. We've been trying to get them on the phone to see what the deal is but haven't been able to. I'm thinking of just getting dressed and at dinnertime going to eat dinner instead of waiting to hear from them.
I'm hungry. I think it's making me snarly.
You know the pencil test? Where you take a pencil and put it under your boobs and if the pencil doesn't fall then that means they are too saggy? Sweety was getting a canned drink out of the icebox yesterday and decided to give me the pencil test using a soda can. I failed. That fucking can didn't move once he got it tucked under my boobs. I gave him a nosebleed using my supersonic thoughtbeams. He will be sorry when I get them perked up and start going to the grocery store in a bikini top.
My computer had been running very slow and yesterday I couldn't even get to AOL. I managed to reinstall that and then clean up some other things on the computer. Hopefully it will keep on running.
The canines were bathed today. And they are both so exhausted from it that they're sleeping like rocks. I am tempted to wake them so they won't keep me awake tonight playing with each other.
We're supposed to go out to eat with another couple tonight or if they can't get a babysitter they are coming over here. We've been trying to get them on the phone to see what the deal is but haven't been able to. I'm thinking of just getting dressed and at dinnertime going to eat dinner instead of waiting to hear from them.
I'm hungry. I think it's making me snarly.
8/5/05
Stuff Portrait Friday
This weeks topics are: My Horrible Habit, Something I Obsess Over and Something that Causes Anxiety.
And since it was hard to get photos of the aforementioned things I thought I'd just tell ya about them instead.
My Horrible Habit
The picking of my skin. I can feel around and find some type of teensy bump and then need to remove it. I am recovering. It was really bad on my chest area and face and legs but I've managed to isolate it to just the top parts of my legs for now. It's a totally stress related thing. If I've had a crappy day at work I will head to the bathroom for a little pick-party and before I know it an hour and a half has passed. Not only is this totally disgusting it freaks Sweety out if he can tell what I've been up to and then I feel like I need to apologize for the physical manifestation of my mental problem.
Something I Obsess Over
Aging. I do a careful wrinkle check usually after I've picked my legs to bits. Botox is in my future.
Something That Causes Anxiety
Having to be around people. I won't go check the mail if the neighbors are outside because then I may have to talk to them. Social settings make me quite uneasy. I have never thrown a party. I try to avoid going to such events because what if I say something stupid? Or everyone hates me? It is just safer to stick close to the house. Sometimes Sweety and I go out but it's usually just me and him or one other couple that we know.
And since it was hard to get photos of the aforementioned things I thought I'd just tell ya about them instead.
My Horrible Habit
The picking of my skin. I can feel around and find some type of teensy bump and then need to remove it. I am recovering. It was really bad on my chest area and face and legs but I've managed to isolate it to just the top parts of my legs for now. It's a totally stress related thing. If I've had a crappy day at work I will head to the bathroom for a little pick-party and before I know it an hour and a half has passed. Not only is this totally disgusting it freaks Sweety out if he can tell what I've been up to and then I feel like I need to apologize for the physical manifestation of my mental problem.
Something I Obsess Over
Aging. I do a careful wrinkle check usually after I've picked my legs to bits. Botox is in my future.
Something That Causes Anxiety
Having to be around people. I won't go check the mail if the neighbors are outside because then I may have to talk to them. Social settings make me quite uneasy. I have never thrown a party. I try to avoid going to such events because what if I say something stupid? Or everyone hates me? It is just safer to stick close to the house. Sometimes Sweety and I go out but it's usually just me and him or one other couple that we know.
8/4/05
Half Nekkid Thursday
The one on the left is the what I've worn to work every Thursday and Monday for the last 3 years. I'm tired of looking at that shoe. I'm feeling pretting effing cute today. Now I can go to work and show off my scarred up knees and shins!
I'll Be Damned
Is that the husband asleep behind me? Why I do believe it is. Crapola. I'm gonna let him rest for an hour or so more before I wake him up and demand the things that come with marriage. That would be sex dammit.
Sometimes it really, really, really sucks working opposite schedules. The reason we do this is so that one of us will always be at home if the one of the boys needs to come home early from school sick or something or wants someone to go on a field trip with them. But it is nights like this that I think they are getting to be old enough to be latch-key kids.
He asked me a few times this afternoon what was wrong with me and said that I seemed out of it. Honestly, every time I looked at him I remembered that today I put myself on a big ass house loan with him and that ranks right up there with getting married as far as I'm concerned. I almost feel it's more permanent than marriage. Until now we've kept all of our finances separate with the exception of the people wagon that's parked in the garage. I don't know about all that soul mate blahety blah, but I do think (hope) that we'll get to see each other turn old like albino raisins. It does please me that I am the first wife to be on the house title.
I don't know if I've mentioned it yet but I will be 29 in 3 days. And that is kinda making me nerky as well. On August 7 of 1976 my Mom brought a squawlbag into the world and that bitch is just a little over a year away from turning 30.
Getting older really freaks me out. That is some of the reason I bought new clothes. Some girls walk around work looking like anorexic toothpicks and every time one of them walks by I catch myself sucking in my gut and holding my breath. There are ladies I work with that look like they've boinged out bunches of children and they are more fashionable than me. Sweety told me if I wanted new work clothes that he'd be happy to buy me a pair of overalls for every day of the week. Isn't he kind?
I'm gonna go put some spray tan on my person so I'll look healthy in my new dress tomorrow.
Sometimes it really, really, really sucks working opposite schedules. The reason we do this is so that one of us will always be at home if the one of the boys needs to come home early from school sick or something or wants someone to go on a field trip with them. But it is nights like this that I think they are getting to be old enough to be latch-key kids.
He asked me a few times this afternoon what was wrong with me and said that I seemed out of it. Honestly, every time I looked at him I remembered that today I put myself on a big ass house loan with him and that ranks right up there with getting married as far as I'm concerned. I almost feel it's more permanent than marriage. Until now we've kept all of our finances separate with the exception of the people wagon that's parked in the garage. I don't know about all that soul mate blahety blah, but I do think (hope) that we'll get to see each other turn old like albino raisins. It does please me that I am the first wife to be on the house title.
I don't know if I've mentioned it yet but I will be 29 in 3 days. And that is kinda making me nerky as well. On August 7 of 1976 my Mom brought a squawlbag into the world and that bitch is just a little over a year away from turning 30.
Getting older really freaks me out. That is some of the reason I bought new clothes. Some girls walk around work looking like anorexic toothpicks and every time one of them walks by I catch myself sucking in my gut and holding my breath. There are ladies I work with that look like they've boinged out bunches of children and they are more fashionable than me. Sweety told me if I wanted new work clothes that he'd be happy to buy me a pair of overalls for every day of the week. Isn't he kind?
I'm gonna go put some spray tan on my person so I'll look healthy in my new dress tomorrow.
8/3/05
TMI
Sweety came in from running to the store and began to disrobe to take a shower. Usually we take them later on so I asked him what was up. And he informed me that he had some kind of illness that was making his butt leak. Thanks hon, I really needed to know that.
At SK's place I posted what I was doing right now. Sweety just came in and made his announcement. I think I will go pour myself another.
At SK's place I posted what I was doing right now. Sweety just came in and made his announcement. I think I will go pour myself another.
We Are REALLY Married Now
Not that we haven't been legally married for the last 4 odd years. Just today we remortgaged our house and I am now on the title. I didn't really want to be on it but it was necessary in order to redo the mortgage. I feel more married now than I did earlier today. I mean before if I lost my marbles and wanted to run screaming away there was nothing really keeping me here. Now if I ever want to run into the burning sunset I'll have this house thing on my credit. Not that I ever plan on doing that. But it's always nice to have a Plan B.
I was reading Anne Arkham's post over at Art. Humor. Larceny. about first impressions and it made me think. I'm really bad about picking people to shreds when I'm waiting in line or just out and about somewhere. So I've started making it a little game. Someone's got on weird hat? They must have cancer. Eyebrows drawn on funny? They're suffering from that disease where you yank them out. Oversized person crammed into clothes that are way too small? Overactive thyroid. In the grocery store with no shoes? Of course their house has just burned down and they are rebuilding their wardrobe after they get a six-pack. It's a way to help the line move faster for me at wallyworld.
Before signing my total financial self away I went to the mall. You see that photo of me in my profile? The flannel jacket? That's the one that I wear to work every single day over my regular clothes cause they keep it so freaking cold in the office. I decided if I was going to wear cute clothes that I may as well get a sweater that looks like it belongs to a female and not a Granpa.
Friday is meet the teacher day at the boys' school. I can't wait. I'll get to use my evil thoughtbeams on the EW. If she were to ever be stricken unconscious in my presence I'd PRETEND to have CPR and try to save her.
I'm feeling grouchy and I have no idea why. I'm going to try and fake some cheer and maybe it will become reality.
I was reading Anne Arkham's post over at Art. Humor. Larceny. about first impressions and it made me think. I'm really bad about picking people to shreds when I'm waiting in line or just out and about somewhere. So I've started making it a little game. Someone's got on weird hat? They must have cancer. Eyebrows drawn on funny? They're suffering from that disease where you yank them out. Oversized person crammed into clothes that are way too small? Overactive thyroid. In the grocery store with no shoes? Of course their house has just burned down and they are rebuilding their wardrobe after they get a six-pack. It's a way to help the line move faster for me at wallyworld.
Before signing my total financial self away I went to the mall. You see that photo of me in my profile? The flannel jacket? That's the one that I wear to work every single day over my regular clothes cause they keep it so freaking cold in the office. I decided if I was going to wear cute clothes that I may as well get a sweater that looks like it belongs to a female and not a Granpa.
Friday is meet the teacher day at the boys' school. I can't wait. I'll get to use my evil thoughtbeams on the EW. If she were to ever be stricken unconscious in my presence I'd PRETEND to have CPR and try to save her.
I'm feeling grouchy and I have no idea why. I'm going to try and fake some cheer and maybe it will become reality.
8/2/05
I Made Out Like A Bandit
Went back to the mall today to take advantage of the sale that Penney's was having. I am very pleased with my purchases. 2 pairs o' shoes, 3 shirts, 2 dresses, 2 pairs of pants. And all are things that I can wear to work or elsewhere. Usually I'm totally frumped out when I go to work but I've decided to start dressing like it looks like I care. The new shirts and dresses hint at the fact that I have boobage instead of looking like a I'm wearing a tent and the shoes are little strappy things instead of boys formal shoes. The people at my job may not recognize me. I spent more than I meant to but I saved more than I spent. I've left the tags on everything in case I get any buyer's regret and feel the need to return anything. Don't think it's gonna happen though. This was the first pain free shopping excursion I've had in a long time. The clothes just came crawling out of the racks towards me. I felt like the Pied Piper of Women's Clothing.
When Sweety and the boys got home I showed off my new things. They didn't get my excitement but they were a good audience. I did a little fashion show for Sweety. He thinks I'm getting ready to fly the coop on him. I just told him that I was tired of wearing the same pair of khakis and my Granpa's flannel jacket to work. This is the first time that I've been clothes shopping and was happy with the way everything fit. I didn't buy anything that I felt like I needed to lose weight to get in to or that didn't feel good when I was sitting down.
Yesterday morning I took the boys to their mom's and Sweety was supposed to pick them up after work. EW called him yesterday and asked if they could spend the night and he'd pick them up today after work and on Sunday instead of staying with her (since it's her weekend) they'd be here and we'd take them to their first day of school on Monday. She said it would just be to hard to get them ready for school and her other kids. Gee, I wonder what will happen for the rest of the school year?
Anyhoo, I forgot my phone when I went into the mall and when I got out there were 7 calls from Sweety. LB told EW that he was ready come back to our house early instead of waiting for his dad to come pick them up so she brought them over here and I was gone. Sweety was wondering when I'd be back. He was kind of snippy on the phone because I didn't answer. He has since apologized. I told him if I'd have known I'd be needed here to hang out with the boys today I'd have stayed close to the house. But, truth be known, I'm glad that I was gone. I'd been looking forward to having today alone and I did get a good mall trip accomplished. And the boys are no worse for wear. They did get to spend some extra quality time with their mother. I think when the boys are at one place they should stay there until whenever it's been agreed upon by their parents that they'll be leaving. If they start picking and choosing when they'll go to who's house I think chaos and hurt feelings will follow.
When Sweety and the boys got home I showed off my new things. They didn't get my excitement but they were a good audience. I did a little fashion show for Sweety. He thinks I'm getting ready to fly the coop on him. I just told him that I was tired of wearing the same pair of khakis and my Granpa's flannel jacket to work. This is the first time that I've been clothes shopping and was happy with the way everything fit. I didn't buy anything that I felt like I needed to lose weight to get in to or that didn't feel good when I was sitting down.
Yesterday morning I took the boys to their mom's and Sweety was supposed to pick them up after work. EW called him yesterday and asked if they could spend the night and he'd pick them up today after work and on Sunday instead of staying with her (since it's her weekend) they'd be here and we'd take them to their first day of school on Monday. She said it would just be to hard to get them ready for school and her other kids. Gee, I wonder what will happen for the rest of the school year?
Anyhoo, I forgot my phone when I went into the mall and when I got out there were 7 calls from Sweety. LB told EW that he was ready come back to our house early instead of waiting for his dad to come pick them up so she brought them over here and I was gone. Sweety was wondering when I'd be back. He was kind of snippy on the phone because I didn't answer. He has since apologized. I told him if I'd have known I'd be needed here to hang out with the boys today I'd have stayed close to the house. But, truth be known, I'm glad that I was gone. I'd been looking forward to having today alone and I did get a good mall trip accomplished. And the boys are no worse for wear. They did get to spend some extra quality time with their mother. I think when the boys are at one place they should stay there until whenever it's been agreed upon by their parents that they'll be leaving. If they start picking and choosing when they'll go to who's house I think chaos and hurt feelings will follow.
Too Early
I am awake letting the dogs eat their breakfast and take their morning poops and then I can go back to bed. The bad thing about me being on the internet when I'm tired is that I have a tendency to sometimes make lots of ebay bids on things that I don't really need. I am pleased that I've controlled that urge this morning. I'm dying to get tiny dog this shirt but I do realize it would be nuts to spend that much money on dog clothes. But you can't tell me that it's not totally effing cute. I could get it for her and I could wear my new pink dress and we could have our picture made.
It seems that our remortgage will go through. YAY! Sweety did play a mean ass trick on me though. He told me that he had good news and bad news. Of course I want the bad first. He said that we could get the loan but only if we paid the thing that was on my credit report (the truck loan from my ex) and that the bank offered to let us pay it off at 10% which would be about 1100.00. Immediately I start to get pissed thinking why should we pay any of that shit and I ask him what is the good news. At that moment our cell phones lose service. Luckily I decided to call him back and not my old bank to rant and rave about having to pay anything on a loan that isn't mine. That's when he told me he was just kidding and we're getting our remortgage done and we don't have to pay anything on the shit that's on my credit report. Ha fucking ha. I hope Sweety got a good laugh. I think my blood pressure doubled during our phone call.
Oh good. Queen Tiny Dog is finished with her breakfast and is ready to hop in bed with me.
It seems that our remortgage will go through. YAY! Sweety did play a mean ass trick on me though. He told me that he had good news and bad news. Of course I want the bad first. He said that we could get the loan but only if we paid the thing that was on my credit report (the truck loan from my ex) and that the bank offered to let us pay it off at 10% which would be about 1100.00. Immediately I start to get pissed thinking why should we pay any of that shit and I ask him what is the good news. At that moment our cell phones lose service. Luckily I decided to call him back and not my old bank to rant and rave about having to pay anything on a loan that isn't mine. That's when he told me he was just kidding and we're getting our remortgage done and we don't have to pay anything on the shit that's on my credit report. Ha fucking ha. I hope Sweety got a good laugh. I think my blood pressure doubled during our phone call.
Oh good. Queen Tiny Dog is finished with her breakfast and is ready to hop in bed with me.
8/1/05
Some Photos
The pink dress in action. The other shoes did look better but these were so much more comfy and worry free.
The Sweety and me. Have I mentioned that I love the fact that he's tall?
This is a little self photo I did on the way home. Put me through a sudden rainstorm and give me 3 long island teas and this is what you get.
You can tell I'm tipsy cause I'm smiling enough to make my under eye bags pop out.
The Sweety and me. Have I mentioned that I love the fact that he's tall?
This is a little self photo I did on the way home. Put me through a sudden rainstorm and give me 3 long island teas and this is what you get.
You can tell I'm tipsy cause I'm smiling enough to make my under eye bags pop out.
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